Mmmm. There’s nothing quite like it! Warm and melty, salty with a touch of sweet – butter accentuates and completes the flavor of some of our favorite foods. Its smooth oily-ness not only adds moisture to our crumbly baked goods, but it’s also a very useful slippery coating for our baking pans.

Although I’m a huge fan of buttering my food, “buttering up” has never really been my thing. Spreading on some slick compliments and calorie-filled praise may have helped me get my way or at least win someone’s favor, but I’ve never been one to indulge. I may have remained on my parents’, teachers’, and bosses’ good sides, but it wasn’t the result of flattery. Even today, I’m not one to hand out compliments where I don’t believe they are fully deserved and my intentions aren’t 100% pure.

A couple months ago, I picked up “Fervent: A Woman’s Battle Plan for Serious, Specific, and Strategic Prayer” by Priscilla Shirer. I knew my prayer life was dry and needed some flavor, and this book seemed perfect.

As I began reading, I wasn’t surprised to be introduced to yet another prayer “acronym”. And since I’ve been using the “ACTS”* prayer pattern for many years, I wasn’t surprised to see this one – “PRAY”** – also begin with “praising” God.

As soon as I read this, though, I immediately felt discouraged. Because it’s not really my thing. Believe me, I’ve tried, but I just can’t escape the fact that it feels fake. Whenever I try to put together some words of adoration towards God, it feels awkward and contrived – like I’m just trying to impress Him with some big-worded compliments or “get on His good side”. It feels like I’m trying to butter Him up.

And since I’m not really into that, many times I’ve thought it makes more sense just to skip it. If my heart’s not 100% there and I’m not naturally, in that moment, overflowing with praise for God, then why should I even bother? I would never want Him to think I was just making up something that sounds good. I would never want Him to think I was just doing it to get what I want.

But, as Shirer states right from the beginning, “[Praise is] not just a means of warming up (or buttering up). It’s not just a preamble before getting down to what we really came to say. Gratitude to God for who He is and what He’s already done should thread throughout every prayer because ultimately His name and His fame are the only reasons any of this matters.” (p. 21)

It occurred to me as I read this that maybe the reason for the dryness in my prayers was the result of a lack of butter. Not because God needed buttering up, but because I needed it.

It turns out that deliberate, intentional praise is actually the substance that prepares and smooths the surface of our hearts as we pray. Because any way that we can lift Him up reminds us of who we are in comparison. Any way we can recount what He has already done assures us of how much we can trust Him before we even ask. Any way we can make it about Him prepares us for a conversation – where it’s not just about what we want to say to God, but what He might want to say to us. And any words we can find to describe His character give us a taste of His rich and delightful goodness toward us as His children.

It turns out that praise is the butter of prayer – just not in the way I originally thought. Even if the best words we can come up with sound cheesy or repetitive or simple and even if our (very human and very volatile) human hearts aren’t 100% all-in, praising God not only brings Him glory, but it changes us in the process. And honestly, life is just better when I begin and end my day by soaking my heart with a large pat of praise.

“It is good to give thanks to the LORD,
to sing praises to your name, O Most High;
to declare your steadfast love in the morning,
and your faithfulness by night”
(Psalm 92:1-2)

So beginning that day, I decided to make praising God a non-optional part of my prayers. And since, believe it or not, I struggle to come up with the words, I’ve decided to start by borrowing someone else’s. The Psalms are full of words of praise, so each morning I find a verse or two to copy down into my prayer journal as I begin to pray. Each day, my mind is being coated with thoughts of Him and my heart is being softened by who He is. I know now that it really is good to praise our God.

*Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving, Supplication
**Praise, Repent, Ask, “Yes”

I’ve said a lot of things I regret. In the thirty-something years I’ve been using this mouth it’s caused me quite a bit of trouble!

A lot of times it’s just silly stuff – like getting someone’s name wrong or trying to be funny or ‘cool’ and failing miserably. As a very ‘open’ person, I’m a professional at making people uncomfortable by sharing too much information or telling long stories that really have nothing to do with anything. Also, I hate silence, so I’m always looking for ways to fill those gaps in conversation – but since I’m not a quick-thinker, I tend to make an awkward moment even more awkward.

But the times I regret most are the times the sinful condition of my heart has leaked out of my lips – because unfortunately, “the mouth speaks what the heart is full of” (Luke 6:45). Since I’m human, there’s a lot of pride, judgement, defensiveness and fear hanging out in there – and when I empty that stuff out on the people around me, I’m left with a heart full of shame and regret.

Because there’s no “undo” button.

We’ve grown spoiled in our technological age – our mistakes can often be completely and immediately fixed with the touch of a button, and no one ever has to know! We can backspace, edit, revert, and get a re-do on almost anything. As my older two girls have started being assigned more computer-based projects, I’ve loved teaching them that “Ctrl + Z is your best friend!” This stress-saving feature has revolutionized our world because we are free to make mistakes when we know we can always “undo” them.

Unfortunately, sometimes what we think is sparing us stress may actually be causing it! In a world where we can always “undo”, we have mastered the art of perfecting our presentation. When we color outside the lines – instead of having to let it show and let it go, we can just tap a button, rewind, and try again. And when we’re constantly exposed to the perfected images of those around us, we leave ourselves vulnerable to feelings of shame whenever we seem to be falling short.

We’ve all felt the society and culture-based shame that comes from not measuring up to the standards we are (or think we are) being judged by. The desire to be accepted and fit in with a crowd (yes, even for us ‘grown-ups’) is real and sometimes the things that come out of our mouths in an attempt to belong or impress surprise us! Like me, you’ve probably said a few things over the years that made you look a little foolish or feel embarrassed – they may have even left you feeling that you’ve accomplished the opposite of your goal!

But the greater shame, like I said before, comes from the times I “bite” on the temptation to spill out those juicy tidbits of gossip, share that critical ‘observation’ I made on someone’s behavior, ‘vent’ my frustration when things (a.k.a. people) don’t go the way (a.k.a. do what) I thought they should, or when I vomit my emotional state to my family making sure they know exactly how they are at fault for it. It’s in those moments a part of me wants to run and hide – or at least never open my mouth again.

In Genesis 3, we are first introduced to the concept of shame. Adam and Eve had literally taken a bite of sin – they gave in to the temptation and chose to satisfy a desire their own way instead of God’s. And immediately, instead of feeling fulfilled, they felt naked and exposed.

Genesis 3:8 says, “Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the LORD God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day”. At any point before this, they would have welcomed and been overjoyed to be in the presence of God – but now joy had been traded for shame, and “they hid from the LORD God among the trees of the garden.”

As a sinner myself, I feel Adam and Eve’s pain – that deep-in-the-pit-of-their-stomachs regret and desperate desire to turn back time and undo what they had done. The pangs of fear that their exposure would be their undoing and that they would not only disappoint God, but be rejected by Him. So they “made coverings for themselves” and then they hid, hoping to avoid the even greater shame that would come from being in God’s holy presence.

God created a lot of things, but shame wasn’t one of them. It was introduced by the evil one and then reinforced by the deceitful condition of the human heart – twisting the conviction of sin (“You made a bad choice”) to a questioning of His character (“You are a bad choice”). It was not ever God’s intention that we would feel the need to escape from His presence – it was never His intention that we would hide because of the fear of being rejected by Him.

And though their sin couldn’t be undone, their shame could. Verse 21 says, “The LORD God made garments of skin for Adam and his wife and clothed them.” They had tried to cover it up on their own – even to the point of refusing to take the blame when they had been caught. But instead of furthering their shame, God Himself made a sacrifice in order to take it away.

In the same way, “Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God” (1 Peter 3:18). Because of the sacrifice God made on our behalf, “there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Romans 8:1). So when we sin, instead of trying to cover up or hide, instead of living in defeat and beating ourselves up, instead of wishing for an “undo”, we can “approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” (Hebrews 4:16)

No matter how valuable this little button has been to me over the years, it hasn’t always saved me. There are times a program or app will only go back a certain number of steps and, of course, plenty of times where there should be an “undo” button, but there isn’t! (Like the app I use to write this blog – I found that out the hard way…)

But sometimes I’m actually glad – because it worked out better in the end that I couldn’t go back. Not being able to fix something the way I wanted to fix it meant I learned something new or had to (gulp) ask for help – and that person ended up making my project better than I ever could have made it.

It’s the same with my sin. Of course I would love to go back in time (to so many times) and, knowing what I know now, tape my big mouth shut! But, in the end, every time I fall short it gives me that push I need to run straight to the presence of God – to a place where I can be overwhelmed by His glory, confess my sin and then be reminded of His great love for me. And I wouldn’t trade that for anything!

“There’s nothing worth more
That could ever come close
No thing can compare
You’re our living hope
Your presence, Lord

I’ve tasted and seen
Of the sweetest of loves
Where my heart becomes free
And my shame is undone
Your presence, Lord

Holy Spirit, You are welcome here
Come flood this place and fill the atmosphere
Your glory, God, is what our hearts long for
To be overcome by Your presence, Lord”*

*“Holy Spirit”, Lyrics by Bryan & Katie Torwalt

As church youth leaders, Tim and I get invited to our fair share of weddings. Especially now that we’ve been doing high school ministry for almost ten years – the invitations are rolling in. And although anything involving the word “formal” is not our forte, we feel very honored and blessed to be able to celebrate these special days with our former students and interns!

When our most recent intern, Jake, invited us to his wedding in northern Vermont, we were thrilled because the timing was perfect. We were already going to be in Vermont anyway, and the idea of leaving the kids with Nana and Grandpa and turning it into a weekend away for the two of us sounded great!

Since the wedding was on Saturday afternoon at 2:00, we took the opportunity to sleep in (woo-hoo!), go out to breakfast, and then visit some local friends for lunch. We got ourselves fancied up for the event, and, in typically Tim and Mandy style – left with just barely enough time to get there.

We pulled into the parking lot at 2:01 ( Yikes!), hurried out of the car, and started walking toward the building. As we got a little closer, though, we started hearing the beats of loud music coming from inside. “Hmmm… that’s kind of odd,” we thought. “Why would they be playing dance music before the wedding?”

Our questions were answered immediately when we walked into the building and saw this:

Yep, we were not just a minute late. We were three hours late. We totally missed the wedding. Ouch.

You may be wondering: How did this happen? Why in the world did we think the wedding was at 2:00 anyway?

The answer is: we have no idea. Tim says I told him it was at 2:00, and I think he told me it was at 2:00. Regardless, we both had every opportunity to double-check the time. Tim was even on Jake and Mackenzie’s (super-cool and very informative – why didn’t they have this when we were getting married?!) wedding website looking up directions the day before!

Truthfully, though, the majority of the blame falls on me.

You see, I recently discovered this amazing, revolutionary, life-altering feature on my phone. If you’re an iPhone person this may be hard for you to understand, but Android phones have these awesome things called “widgets”. And the Google Calendar app now has a “widget” that allows me to display my calendar on the home screen of my phone – no buttons to push, no days to select – my schedule for that day is right there every time I turn my screen on. As the day goes on, the events scroll through and I can see what’s coming next – so I’ll never miss anything!

As long as I actually look at it.

I can’t even tell you how many times that day (or any of the previous days, as this was the ONLY event on my calendar that week) I had been on my phone – reading a text, writing a message, or checking social media. And in all those times, I never actually looked at the calendar – because “Jake and Mackenzie’s Wedding, 11AM” was right there.

Two years ago this January, I set out to read through the entire Bible, and I officially accomplished that goal as of December 31st of last year. I learned so much and gained an incredible “big picture” perspective during that time! But for the next few years, I’ve decided to slow things down, go through it all again, and find all the little stuff I might have missed.

In my first few days in Genesis so far, I’ve already been shocked and brought to my knees several times by things I never noticed before or have come to see in a new way. In every segment of a few verses, there has been something that applied directly to my life or that has given me a deeper understanding of who God is and who I am in light of that.

The temptation, though, when I read passages like this that are SO familiar (I’ve read, studied, heard sermons about, and even taught on these verses dozens of times!), is to just skim over them or skip whole sections entirely because “I already know all of this”. But like my smartphone calendar, we make dangerous assumptions when we think we’ve seen or heard it all before – and then don’t take the time to really look at it.

Reading the Bible is not a ‘hit or miss’ activity. I don’t have to open it up just hoping that maybe God will speak to me through His words that day. Hebrews 4:12 says that, “the word of God is alive and active” and I can be assured that He always has plans to bring about growth and change in my life through it. There is something He wants me to see every single time I open it up – the question is: Am I also opening up my heart and my eyes to actually look for it?

The two-hour car ride home from the wedding last Saturday was a long one. We were frustrated, irritable and just flat-out disappointed. It wasn’t like anyone was depending on us being there – we only really knew one other person. And when we congratulated (and apologized to) Jake, he was very gracious and understanding.

But the thing was that we just missed out! We missed out on the experience of being there to see two really amazing people get married. We missed out on celebrating this important day with them!

One of my favorite verses in the whole Bible is found in the book of Esther. Esther, a queen, has been presented with a potentially life-altering opportunity. As she is weighing the risk, her older and wiser cousin, Mordecai, says this: “If you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father’s family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?” (Esther 4:14)

The truth is that God is God and if He wants to speak something into your life, He will absolutely find a way – whether you’re looking for it or not. But every time you read or hear a passage from God’s word you are facing a potentially life-altering experience – who knows that God did not place that exact verse in your path “for such a time as this”? Who knows but that the answer to your stress, your worry, or your burden that day might be right in front of you?

“Lord, open my eyes and ears and heart to Your Word today. I know You have something to say – and I don’t want to miss it!”

“I’m dreaming of a white…” Oh wait, I guess it’s too late for that! But winter isn’t over yet – and as long as we don’t get more than three snow days (we want our spring break!), let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!

There’s something about snow that fascinates us. For some it’s a sentimental excitement stemming from childhood memories. For many it’s the relief of a day off of work or school. And for most it’s just the unmatched peace and beauty of that glistening, soft, pure white blanket covering the world around us.

Last week we had the opportunity to be in Vermont for one of their first snows of the season. It was awesome! No matter how much I dislike the cold, I love a good snowstorm.

But I was reminded, as I am every year, that the beauty is short-lived. A couple of passes by the plows spreading sand and salt and that wonderful white perfection is now an ugly half-melted mess of dirt and ice. Even the snow that wasn’t anywhere near the street seems to be quickly littered with little specks of debris.

It’s the story of humanity that runs from the first pages of Scripture all the way to us in 2016 – moments of glory, quickly followed by moments of failure. Great acts of obedience soon plowed off to the side by the temptations of the flesh. Hearts of pure trust tainted by the debris of doubt and self-interest.

The story of King David might be one of the most poignant. As a young man, David was chosen by God to be the next king of His people. And though the road to taking the throne was not necessarily pretty, David continued on in obedience. This obedience resulted in great blessing and David was so successful it seemed nothing could take him down.

Until one spring, when a series of selfish choices led him to do the unthinkable – to sleep with a woman he was not married to and then, in an attempt to hide his guilt, order the death of her husband. His cover was blown by the prophet Nathan, who confronted the king in his sin, exposing the dirty mess of David’s heart.

In response to these events, David penned one of my favorite psalms:

“Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love; according to your great compassion blot out my transgressions.
Wash away all my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin.
For I know my transgressions, and my sin is always before me.
Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight; so you are right in your verdict and justified when you judge.
Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me.
Yet you desired faithfulness even in the womb; you taught me wisdom in that secret place.
Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.” (Psalm 51:1-7)

This psalm stands in stark contrast to almost every other psalm David wrote because instead of proclaiming his own righteousness before his human enemies, David confesses His sinfulness before God, acknowledging the enemy within. In verse seven, he declares that the desire of His heart is to be made clean – to experience the purity of being made “whiter than snow”.

Every winter, I find myself wishing there was a way to clear off the roads and keep people safe, but then somehow return the snow back to it’s original pristine perfection. Unfortunately, once it’s contaminated, there’s no going back – no amount of rearranging it, bleaching it, or covering it up would ever work. The only way to restore the purity is for the snow to melt, evaporate, and be regenerated back into new, fresh snow.

We know from 2 Samuel 11 that David did make an unsuccessful attempt to “clean” himself by covering up his sin. And when confronted by Nathan, he could have continued the pattern by trying to rearrange the mess and make it look a little less ugly. He could have pointed the finger at his past or his enemies, making excuses because of all he had been through. He could have tried to sugar-coat it with a layer of fancy fluff to make what he did not seem quite so “bad”.

But he didn’t. Instead, in Psalm 51, David’s defenses melted. He admitted his transgression was great by acknowledging that “great” compassion was needed. He confessed that his sin was “always before” him and then he owned it by declaring he was “sinful from birth”. David knew that the only way to be made clean was to accept God’s verdict and then allow Him to do the “cleaning” work.

One of the greatest temptations we face in our world today is the temptation to try to “clean” ourselves – to clear our name by covering things up or blaming someone or something else. In a world where tolerance is valued over truth, it’s easy to just rearrange the details with some sugary fluff and call it “all good”. But we’re not doing ourselves any favors – it’s not working.

1 John 1:9 says, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” Like David, the only way we can be made truly clean is to agree with God in His verdict and then allow Him to do the cleansing work.

And thankfully, He already did. “He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior.” (Titus 3:5-6) The “washing” work was done on the cross and now all that is required is for us to accept it. When we do, we become like that fresh, pure coat of snow – the dirty mess of our sin is gone in the eyes of God – and we are made new.

For those of you who are looking forward to some southeastern Pennsylvania snow as much as I am, there’s some good news in our extended forecast! I don’t want to get my hopes up, but I can’t wait to look out my window and see that beautiful scene. Even if it’s going to melt into a yucky mess a couple days later – I’ll take it!

I feel David’s pain when he described his sin as being “always before” him. I may have my moments of glory – when obedience and trust just seem easy – but the moments of failure always seem soon to follow. And even though I know I’ve been made clean in the eyes of God, my eyes still see a whole lot of dirt and debris.

But like the constant cycle of the weather, “renewal by the Holy Spirit” is a process. Not only have I been made new, but I am always being renewed by His Spirit at work in me. The messes I get myself into may cause a meltdown, but every one is an opportunity for Him to remind me that He and only He can make me clean, and that no matter what I see, He sees me as “whiter than snow”.

It was one if those scenes that makes you do a double take. I was dropping Anna off at preschool a few weeks ago and we saw this:

The roads in the area had been under construction for many days because of water company work, and you never knew which sections of road would be blocked off on any given day – filling me and my fellow preschool parents with a load of frustration.

But in the midst of the frustration, came a very welcome humor-break. There was so much water gushing out of that spout it would have filled and overflowed the bucket underneath it in less than two seconds! I’m sure there was a scientific purpose behind it all, but Anna and I sure had a good laugh.

The holiday season is coming to a close. The lights, carols, gifts, and gatherings have stirred up many warm feelings of gladness. But very soon we’ll pack away the festive decorations, say goodbye to 24-7 Christmas music, and pick through those last few leftover cookies and treats. The parties and events we’ve put so much energy and time into preparing for have come and gone and we’ll settle back into the routines of ‘normal’ life.

For many of us, this time of year brings with it some serious letdown. The joy we were so recently brimming with now seems to be in short supply. Even those of us who focus the majority of our Christmas energy on the real “reason” for the season experience a sense of emptiness after the intensity of the advent season fades.

But for God, joy is never in short supply. As the very creator of joy, He is so filled with it that He never experiences a letdown. He rejoices in His creation, delights in His children and finds “infinite zeal and joy and pleasure…in his own worth and glory.” (John Piper) The joy of the Lord is a fixed, permanent, never-changing, never-emptying stream that He is gushing into our buckets.

Unfortunately, if you’re like me, instead of just setting my bucket underneath that stream, I waste a whole lot of time looking for trickles from other faucets. The promises of seasonal gladness and temporary warm feelings sell themselves as “joy”, but the few drops of happiness they release just end up leaking out somehow.

Psalm 4:7 says, “You have put more joy in my heart
than they have when their grain and wine abound.” Jesus didn’t come so that we could remember Him by throwing a great party once a year – He came to pour out on us a joy beyond all joys. He came to “save his people from their sins” (Matthew 1:21) so that we could experience the every day, every moment, eternal kind of joy a relationship with God brings. Because it’s only in His presence that “there is fullness of joy” (Psalm 16:11).

When we sang this chorus in church on Christmas Eve, I couldn’t help but be reminded of the construction scene I saw a few weeks ago:

“Joy, unspeakable joy,
An overflowing well,
No tongue can tell.
Joy, unspeakable joy,
Rises in my soul,
Never lets me go.”*

Although the Christmas season is a great reminder of the joy of our salvation, that same joy is meant to be ours all year long. Every day can become a celebration of the gift God gave us in Jesus and a victory party for the way He has rescued and restored us to Himself. “The contemplation of God to one who knows that this God is his God for ever and ever, is enough to make the eyes overflow with tears, because of the deep, mysterious, unutterable bliss which fills the heart.” (Charles Spurgeon)

Regardless of the season, through the constant changes in circumstance, and in the rolling waves of emotion – “unutterable bliss” is mine for the taking. And the crazy thing is that if I’m positioned to simply receive the outpouring of this joy, my bucket will not only be continuously full, but it will also be continuously overflowing to the world around me – so that others might also become receivers of the gushing waters of unspeakable joy.

*Chris Tomlin, “Joy to the World (Unspeakable Joy)“

The coast was clear – mom was distracted and it was time for “Operation: Find the Presents”. We knew where she hid them and knew we had a few minutes to sneak a quick peek.

But as soon as I saw those beautiful little dolls with hand-crocheted Strawberry Shortcake outfits, I was instantly filled with regret. I had just ruined my own Christmas! There would be no anticipation and no surprise this year – at least in what I was getting from my parents. Thankfully, though, I still had no idea what Santa was bringing 😉

It’s every little kid’s dream – waking up on Christmas morning to an array of gifts, spilling out from beneath the Christmas tree. Sitting there, for what seems like an eternity, staring and wondering, “Which ones are for me?” and “Did I get the things on my list?” Okay, maybe it’s not just the kids.

As parents we know that, even though it would save us hours of blood, sweat, and tears to just set the presents out, unwrapped for all to see, the joy of Christmas is found in the surprise. We wrap the gifts because it’s way more fun to watch the eager anticipation on our children’s faces, and the all-out excitement as they tear into the package, having no idea what it contains.

As the givers of those gifts we have almost as much anticipation as the receivers do. We know our kids well and have (or at least we hope we have) picked out what they will certainly think is the BEST.GIFT.EVER! And even if they don’t really understand it at first, we trust each gift will at least be something they appreciate in the future.

In Psalm 40:5, David writes:
“You have multiplied, O LORD, my God,
your wondrous deeds and your thoughts toward us;
none can compare with you!
I will proclaim and tell of them,
yet they are more than can be told.”

Throughout the span of my almost thirty-eight years (yikes!), my Heavenly Father has given me millions and millions of gifts. I could never even come close to numbering His every thought toward me and His hand at work in every circumstance of my life up to this point.

And I’m so thankful that every single one of them has been a surprise. I’m so glad that my Father hasn’t felt the need to ask me what I want before making His decisions. He knows me better than I know myself and He “knows what [I] need before [I] ask Him.” (Matthew 6:8) Some of these surprises may have confused me in the moment, but in the end they have been exactly what I needed.

The amazing thing is that, for a child of God, every morning can be Christmas morning! Every day, our good, good Father, who delights in giving His children good, good gifts, is lining our trees with packages of His “wondrous deeds” and “thoughts toward us”.

And like Christmas morning, the secret is in the surprise. Even though it sounds at first like it would be better to just take a peek and know God’s plans ahead of time – that would only cause the anticipation and wonder to sneak right out of our lives.

I’m not a morning person (I will certainly not be jumping for joy with my kids when they wake me up early on Friday!), but I have learned that getting out of bed every day is much easier when I’m looking ahead and wondering, “What’s God gonna do today?” The more I anticipate His hand at work in my life, the more I’ll see His hand at work – and the more I’ll be left in awe of His goodness toward me.

A little over ten years ago, the world of Christmas decorations was forever changed. I remember Tim coming home one day, right around this time of year, asking me if I saw the snowman.

“What snowman?” I replied. “There isn’t even any snow!”

“No!” he said. “The people up the street have a giant blow-up snowman in their front yard!”

I didn’t believe him until I saw it for myself.

Having both spent our childhoods in Vermont where there is always snow covering the ground in the winter and almost always a “white” Christmas, we decided this was the most obnoxious thing ever and we were so embarrassed that it was in our neighborhood!

Little did we know that this was only the beginning. Now not only do we have snowmen, but every other character imaginable – sometimes all on the same yard! In some places it’s even become a competition to see who can put the most blow-ups in one small space. No offense to the inflatables or their owners (my kids love them!) but it really cracks me up!

Buried under all the lights and decorations and holiday hoopla is a quiet remembrance, at this time of year, that God humbled Himself and became a man. And though, as the rightful King of the universe, He could have paraded in – in all of His glory and might and taken His throne – He did just the opposite. He came as a vulnerable, helpless baby and, as He walked this earth, He personified humility. Philippians 2:7-8 says, “He made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death—even death on a cross!”

One of the things I just can’t get over about Jesus is his response to the criticism, questioning, disagreement, and even insults that were hurled at Him. Even in the face of flat-out mocking and physical torture, He never argued or complained, lashed out or fought back, ran away or gave up. He remained completely at peace – because, as John 13:3 states, “Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power, and that he had come from God and was returning to God.”

Jesus pointed out to His disciples time after time that they should follow His example. He knew that as they carried His Name and the good news of grace, they would face the same criticisms, disagreements, and insults He faced. He also knew that, unlike Him, they would make mistakes, have weaknesses, and have to respond to the shots and attacks of others who would try to declare them unworthy. And He wanted them to follow His example of humility in the face of those things.

The problem with being a human being with a human nature, though, is that our reaction to criticism, disagreement, or insult is usually the opposite of humble.

A few weeks ago, we were headed, as a family, to our friends’ house for dinner. I was driving and needed to pull over into the right lane to make a turn. I put on my turn signal, turned my head to see if the lane was clear, and began to move over. “WOAH! MANDY! STOP!” (If you think my husband’s voice is loud in normal conversation, you should hear it when he yells!) A small black car was there in the right lane, and I had almost merged directly into them.

I’m a good driver. I’m a safe driver. I don’t make mistakes like that. And I certainly don’t like to be told I might have made a mistake like that. And so, I did what any mature, responsible adult would do – I shut my mouth and gave Tim the silent treatment for approximately five minutes as I remained in the left lane, refusing to pull over. We missed our turn by miles and ended up going way out of our way, but I didn’t care because I was mad. My husband had potentially saved us injuries, a huge hassle, and thousands of dollars in damages – but instead of thanking him, I threw a toddler-sized temper tantrum because my “I’m a good driver” pride had been wounded.

In the New Testament, the word for the opposite of humble – arrogant – literally means “to blow up”. It means to have a “puffed up” view of yourself – placing greater weight, greater importance, and greater rights on your “self” than is actually the case.

A couple days after the initial sighting of our first neighborhood Christmas inflatable, I drove past that house again and during the day and noticed it was gone. Phew, I thought. They must have finally come to their senses and realized how ridiculous this was!

But then I looked closer and realized that it was still there – it was just lying deflated on the ground! When I told Tim, we wondered if a disgruntled neighbor had pulled out their old Red Ryder BB Gun and taken a few shots. Of course, we didn’t know at the time that these new festive lawn ornaments were connected to a power supply and able to be deflated and re-inflated at the touch of a button, so we had a great laugh – until we saw it back up again the following night!

When it comes down to it, the true test of humility in our lives – the true test of how “blown up” we really are – is not in how much we judge others or how often we act like we’re better than everyone else. The true test of humility is found in what deflates us.

When criticism, disagreement, or insult is aimed (or perceived to be aimed) at me, how do I react? Do I melt down into a toddler-sized temper tantrum or giant puddle of tears? Do I burst with defensiveness, trying to justify myself? Do I feel the need to vent all my “puffed up” air onto the people around me or find someone to say nice things that will reinflate my ego?

I know for me it always happens to hit directly at an area where I either thought I was doing really well – or where I knew I was struggling and thought I was doing a good job hiding it. Either way, those pokes and prods are only effective at deflating me because I’ve allowed myself to be “blown up”.

But if I instead remember who I came from – that although I am “dust” (Psalm 103:14), I was created and very purposely formed by God (Psalm 139:14). My strengths were not chosen by me and my weaknesses were chosen by Him to bring Him glory (2 Corinthians 12:9). As a believer in Christ, my sin has been forgiven and I am no longer under any condemnation for it (Romans 8:1).

And if I remember who I will return to – that all of this is but a blip on the radar of eternity, and, regardless of what anyone thinks of me – it’s what they think of Him that really matters. Maybe this perceived “attack” is actually God using me to draw someone else closer to Himself.

If instead of being blown up with the fluff of my “self”, I am filled with a solid understanding of who I am in Christ, there won’t be anything to deflate!

“You’d lose your head if it wasn’t attached to you!”

This was a constant refrain coming from my mother’s mouth as I was growing up. Toys, clothes, homework, retainers, important papers – you name it, I lost it! As long as I’ve had the ability to do it – I’ve been losing stuff.

And it hasn’t gotten much better with age.

Seriously! I need one of those GPS locator systems for my keys, phone, sunglasses, wallet and purse – those everyday items that seem to magically grow legs and walk away every time I put them down!

Most of the time, I can retrace my steps and find what I’m looking for pretty easily. But every once in a while, I really lose something. And when it’s one of those necessities I listed above, I go into full-on worst-case-scenario panic mode!

Thankfully, though, I happen to be married to an incredibly rational and level-headed husband, who is constantly reminding me that whatever it is isn’t lost, it’s just been misplaced.

And of course, he’s always right. It may take some patience and effort, but our misplaced items always turn up somewhere!

When you look around at our world, especially over the past couple of months there is definite reason for worry, fear, and even panic. Mass shootings, suicide bombers, plane crashes, a refugee crisis, protests and riots, and, of course, divisive political debate. There are many days where I don’t even want to click on my news app because I just don’t want to know. Some days I even feel like hope is being lost.

But maybe it’s not actually lost, maybe it’s just being misplaced.

During this advent season, we dwell on what it means that God Himself came to earth. He came to this place to “shine on those living in darkness and in the shadow of death” (Luke 1:79). He came to give hope.

This baby was a sign to God’s people that He had not abandoned them. The birth of Jesus was a clear message that God was still working and still in control – even when it didn’t seem like it. Jesus’ life and death would prove the fullness of the Father’s compassion, and His resurrection would give us a vivid picture of a victorious God who will never fail – and who has the power to defeat even death itself.

That same hope that Jesus came to shine into the darkness is still available to us today. It’s a 100% rock-solid, never-changing hope that – no matter what we see happening around us – the very same God who came to earth to defeat sin and death has not lost an ounce of His power.

Psalm 33:17 says, “A horse is a vain hope for deliverance; despite all its great strength it cannot save.” One of our greatest temptations is to misplace our hope by trusting in the “horses” of this world. There are many varieties and breeds of these “vain hopes” – comfort, safety, pride, our opinions, and our own illusions of control, to name a few.

Verse 22 then goes on to say: “May your unfailing love be with us, LORD, even as we put our hope in you.” The word “put” implies action! To “put our hope” in God means there is an intentional act of our will to place our hope in the right place. Then, it won’t get lost.

A few days ago, I had a ‘light bulb’ moment. I grabbed a basket and set it on the table at the top of the stairs just as you walk in the door to our house. It occurred to me that maybe if I had something in which to proactively “put” my everyday items right when I walk in the door, I might not misplace them as often!

So far, it’s working – my sunglasses, keys, wallet and whatever else haven’t been lost since. It’s only been a few days, but I’m developing a new habit that’s going to prevent a whole lot of panic.

I’m also developing another new habit – reading and copying down a verse of praise from the Bible every morning. It’s my way of intentionally placing my hope in God and who He is before my day even starts and before the temptations to put my hope in other things even arise. I don’t want to mindlessly misplace my hope anymore!

Father, I choose today to put all of my hope in You. In spite of the darkness that surrounds me, shine the light of Your presence, power, and unfailing love so brightly that I don’t even see the other options! Amen.

Dark roast. Light roast. French Roast. Italian Roast. Columbian. Costa Rican. Cappuccino. Frappuccino. Latte. Macchiato. Espresso. Americano. French Vanilla. Hazelnut Mocha. Pumpkin Praline Salted Caramel Gingerbread?

The options, especially over the past few years, have become endless – leaving many casual coffee drinkers staring blankly at menus and aisles full of varieties, flavors, and brands. “Umm.. I’ll just have the ‘regular’ – whatever ‘regular’ is? Or actually, never mind – just make that a hot chocolate.”

And coffee isn’t the only thing we are overwhelmed with choices about.

Spend just a few minutes on social media and you’ll be exposed to a full menu of causes. They’re (almost) all really good things, but some days I feel like if I hear about another “day” for this or “month” for this or “color” for this or “hashtag” for this, I’m gonna lose my mind!

Social media has given us an incredible upgrade in our ability to raise awareness for a cause. Never before have we been able to so easily broadcast to such a large audience the needs of a person or group of people!

The problem is that every cause also has this same ability and the result is that many of us have gone numb. So many causes are brought to our awareness that we no longer actually see any of them. In our heads they all combine into a giant menu of need that we avoid looking at because we know we can’t really do anything to help.

When I first started drinking “real” coffee (as opposed to the stuff that comes from those automatic convenience store machines), I remember standing in the grocery store thinking, “Where am I even supposed to start? How do I know what I’ll like?”

But if you ask me what I’m going to have when I get up tomorrow morning, it’s a no-brainer! Three tablespoons of extra dark roast finely-ground coffee (preferably Haitian!), brewed for exactly five minutes in 17 ounces of water in a french press, topped off with soy creamer and two sugars.

I’ve found my perfect brew.

Early in His time of ministry on earth, Jesus proclaimed His purpose: “The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed free” (Luke 4:18). Though the heart of this “good news” was ultimately the message of salvation through His death and resurrection, Jesus also came to show us a living example of God’s heart of compassion for the hurting.

And now that we have His Spirit within us, He has not only gifted us with abilities to serve one another in the church, but He’s also stirring our hearts to become more like His – and then directing that compassion in a specific direction toward a person or group of people who are suffering.

God has brewed each one of us with a different but perfect combination of ingredients. From the deep genetic roots of your personality to every circumstance that has ground you up and refined you. From your unique tastes and preferences to what makes you boil over in anger – you’ve been prepared for such a cause as this.

Late one night in the spring of 1996, as I was finishing up my last few weeks of high school, I sat in a pile of tears at my family’s dining room table. God had revealed to me that night how selfishly I was living and that His plan for me was so much greater than my own life. This is the verse He used:

“If you pour yourself out for the hungry
and satisfy the desire of the afflicted,
then shall your light rise in the darkness”
(Isaiah 58:10)

I knew that I wanted to do something – I wanted to be poured out. But for who? Well, teenagers, of course – I was headed to college for youth ministry. But I knew that wasn’t all.

I began sponsoring my first Compassion child in 1997. The sacrifice seemed so small and yet the joy and peace that filled my heart was so great – how could I say no to more?

Over the next few years I was able to begin sponsoring several more girls and now, as a family, we’ve continued to support children in need in our country and around the world. Last year, we even added our first sponsored boy, as our church helped build a home for children in India!

I certainly don’t have it all figured out – I know there’s so much more I could be doing, but I’m learning that this is my brew.

And now, when that “giving” time of year approaches, instead of being overwhelmed by the options and feeling guilty for what I can’t do, I stick to my brew. Each year at this time, we go shopping as a family and fill “Hope Packs” with supplies for children going into foster care – it’s a no-brainer!

So, on this #givingtuesday, what’s your brew? How has God uniquely combined your personality with your experiences and heart-tugs to stir up a deep, rich compassion for those who are hurting?

Instead of staring blankly at the menu or just ordering the hot chocolate – instead of living in defeat that you can’t make a difference or feeling guilty and just giving a little here and a little there, ask God to give your compassion direction – and then pour it out!

Ahhh. It’s almost here. I can smell it already. Turkey. Gravy. Mashed potatoes. Stuffing. Homemade cranberry sauce. Pumpkin pie! In just a couple of days, the aromas of Thanksgiving will fill the house.

Last year, however, the aroma that filled our house was anything but pleasing!

We were in Vermont with my parents, and preparations were being made for the big meal. Desserts were prepped, vegetables peeled, and the turkey was thawing in the sink.

At one point that morning, I was putting a dish in the dishwasher and I noticed a weird smell. “Must be a dirty dish,” I thought.

A little while later, I walked through the kitchen again and smelled the same strange odor. “Oh! It must the compost bucket,” I thought. “Yeah, that’s gotta be it.”

By midday, though, the stench had spread and was impossible to dismiss any longer. A quick conference of the adults in the house revealed that we had all been aware of the smell, but no one took the time to figure out where it was coming from. We followed our noses and, sure enough, all noses pointed to: The turkey.

Yep, it was bad. Really bad. It smelled like something died. Which was true, but apparently this bird had expired in more ways than one!

We opened the windows, lit some scented candles, and disposed of the rotten carcass ASAP.

Our senses may have been relieved, but now we had a much bigger problem: The whole extended family was still coming over for dinner and the main course was in the trash can. What in the world were we going to do?

Buy another turkey, of course!

But it was Thanksgiving Day. In rural Vermont. The local grocery store was closed and the nearest alternative was 1/2 an hour away.

As parents of three young children, Tim and I immediately saw the opportunity in this. Leave the kids with Nana and drive. Alone. For a whole hour? Sweet!

The excitement of our fun adventure was quickly met with even more disgust, though, when we got to the store, found a turkey (Yay!), and saw the price tag (Yikes!). Were we really going to pay almost $70 for a TURKEY?!?! We didn’t even have the special card to save the $4!

It was quite a sacrifice, but Thanksgiving 2014 was rescued and we enjoyed every bite of that precious poultry!

This is the time of year when we focus on the goodness of our God and all that He has provided for us. As His children, we know that gratitude – especially for what Jesus did to save us – is essential to our relationship with Him. Not only does it move our hearts toward praise, but it also keeps us from becoming self-centered in our relationships with others.

The thing is that we really do want to be thankful, and we would love for this annual ‘thankfulness boost’ to last all year!

But it never does. And that really stinks.

One of the reasons for this is that, like last year’s rotten turkey, we don’t recognize the foul stench of our own sin. Our gratefulness for what we’ve been saved from fades to bland as we dismiss the strange smells, deciding they must be coming from something (or someone) else. Or we just decide it’s not really that bad. We categorize some sins as worse than others – and then place our own sin somewhere just above average.

We don’t have God’s ‘nose’ – but if we did, we would be appalled – knocked down and overpowered by the vile odor of our mess. We can keep ignoring it all we want, but the truth is: It’s bad. Really bad.

In Amos 5, we get a whiff of an odor God really can’t stand. He says, “I hate, I despise your religious festivals; your assemblies are a stench to me.” (v. 21) What? How is it possible that God could hate the religious festivals and assemblies He Himself had instituted? What could be so bad about His people worshiping Him?

Jesus gives us the answer when He quotes the prophet Isaiah in Matthew 15: “These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.”

It turns out that our loss of true, heartfelt gratitude toward God is not a thing He dismisses, ignores, or leaves at the bottom of some “list of mistakes”. Instead, the offensive fumes of our independence and self-importance rise to the top. They smell like something is dying – and that’s because it is. Those “fumes” are the very things that stifle our relationship with Him.

But there’s some great news. A “Yikes!”-size price was paid – a sacrifice was made by God Himself to replace your ungrateful, dead carcass with a new life in Him. Ephesians 5:2 says, “Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.” The stench of our sin has been replaced with the pleasing aroma of Christ – not because we were really thankful for it, not because we decided to actually make the gratitude thing happen this year, but just because He did it – and we believe it.

So this year, as you experience the smells of the holiday and gobble down that Thanksgiving meal, be thankful! And then let it remind you that as a believer, you are covered, basted, and drenched with the wonderful, pure scent of Christ, no matter what!