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One of the perks of our little suburban life is the ability to walk our kids to and from school every day. It’s only two blocks, we get some fresh air, and they learn important skills about things like crossing the street. Over the years we’ve grown from regular reminders of “You must be holding an adult’s hand!” to the “Look both ways!” stage and now all three of our girls are independent and capable street-crossers.

Well, mostly. One of our children, who shall remain nameless, is a lover of all things “rules”. Not only do rules make her feel safe but rules also give her the ability to rule and be in control (which she may have inherited from a parent who shall also remain nameless).

Even last year, at an *upper elementary* age, our safety-conscious girl would not cross the street alone. I remember telling her to “Go!” one day, but she refused to move and kept looking to the right, to the left, to the right, and to the left again. I was telling her this while standing in the middle of the street, so it was obviously safe, but she still wouldn’t cross!

Over the past several months, I’ve been reading through the book of Isaiah. This book is filled with God’s words to His chosen people about the corruption of their hearts and the misplaced focus of their eyes. As you read, you’ll notice that the people’s greatest sin was not their obsession with pleasure and self-fulfillment, but rather their constant search for security.

Isaiah details a cycle of God making His wisdom, power, and protection available to His people, but in their perceived vulnerability and need for control over their destiny, they repeatedly looked to other sources of security. They looked to the right toward armies, weapons, rulers, and fortresses. They looked to the left at wealth, land, counselors, and fortune-tellers. And they turned those things into (abstract and concrete) idols*.

Isaiah 30:15-16 summarizes it well:

For thus said the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel,
     “In returning and rest you shall be saved;
     in quietness and in trust shall be your strength.”
But you were unwilling, and you said,
“No! We will flee upon horses”

Vulnerability gives rise to fear and when we assume control, fear leads to panic. When we see ourselves as the end all, we see no other option but to look to the right and to the left (and to the right and to the left, and to the right and to the left) for some assurance of safety.

But as the prophet points out in Isaiah 26:3:
“You keep him in perfect peace
    whose mind is stayed on you,
    because he trusts in you.”

Last week, Tim, Anna, and I were on our way home after dropping Amelia off. Since Amelia rode her scooter to school that day, Tim – yes, I said Tim – was riding it home (he lives for this stuff 😉) and Anna was following him, riding her bike.

One of the roads we use on our way home from school has much less traffic, so Anna is allowed to ride her bike in the street – as long as she pays attention to any cars that might be coming or pulling out of driveways.

At one point, after hearing the revving of a starting engine, she stopped and pulled over to the side. Tim, knowing the car was not going to pull out anytime soon, zoomed (well, as fast as you can “zoom” on a child’s scooter) past her. Without hesitation, Anna pulled right out and began to follow him down the street.

It’s easy to think you’re “trusting” God when a situation feels secure – when, with your own two eyes, you’ve looked right and left and found what you believe to be assurance. But trust is taking the step that’s in front of you, not because the situation is secure, but because your confidence in the One leading you is.

Just this morning I had to make a choice that put my overly-sensitive self in a potential danger zone. (Why do I write these words when I know I’m going to have to live them?!?) As I stood at the crossing, I started looking to the right and the left – I began sorting through my feelings, common sense, culture’s social etiquette, and the latest “self-help” advice for something secure. There were plenty of easy ways out, but when I realized what I was doing, I threw them down, looked ahead, and followed Jesus straight across the road.

There’s no guarantee that it’s going to end well. There’s no guarantee I’m not going to get (or at least feel) hurt. Every step I take to follow Jesus may only lead to more uncertainty and His protection may not look like what I want it to look like but “perfect peace” can’t be found in any other direction!

*See Isaiah 2:6-22

Our travels this summer included one day in New Hampshire’s White Mountains – and when the Desilets only have one day in a place, you can bet we’re gonna make it count!

After a scenic drive on the Kancamagus Highway and lunch on the banks of the Swift River, we headed out on the “Boulder Loop Trail”. Tim had done his research and if you know our family, you know adventure doesn’t get much better than a forest full of giant climb-able rocks!

We made quick work of the first several boulders on the trail, but soon arrived at one that “boulder” couldn’t justly describe – it was more like a rock mountain plunged into the middle of the trail. Although the trail turned to the right, we couldn’t resist (who needs the trail anyway?) and up we went.

And up was right! This was a steep climb and the challenge was thrilling – but there were moments when we (okay, I) second-guessed our decision to allow our children (okay, myself) to go this route.

My worries were quickly forgotten when we stepped out onto a breathtaking open rock face overlooking the mountains and valley below. In just a few minutes of hiking, we had gained some serious elevation!

But as we stood there enjoying the view, a rumble of thunder turned our peace into panic. We knew storms were possible that day, but we didn’t know when, and standing there, exposed, on the open rock face of a mountain didn’t seem a like place we wanted to be!

We began looking for a way down, but it seemed we were surrounded by cliffs on every side. Sure, we could have gone back down the way we came, but it was steep, and besides, who does that? Thankfully, we did find a way down and were very grateful when we got back to the safety of our car!

I bet it was thrilling to be a disciple of Jesus. Twelve ordinary guys who, up to that point, had lived ordinary lives now traveled around as a sort of ‘celebrity support crew’. There were no limos, fancy hotels, or gourmet meals, but they were living the high life as eyewitnesses to God Himself showing His glory on earth!

But Mark 8:31 marks a pivotal change in their experience, as Jesus “began to teach them that the Son of Man must suffer many things and be rejected by the elders, the chief priests and the teachers of the law, and that he must be killed and after three days rise again.” These words surely made them uneasy. No one wants to hear that suffering, rejection, and death are going to be in their future, even if that suffering, rejection, and death are going to happen to someone else and you have to witness it!

Then, instead of easing the blow, Jesus added to it by saying, “‘Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me and for the gospel will save it.'” (Mark 8:34-35) It was bad news to hear that Jesus was going to suffer – but now things were getting personal. This was not what they signed up for as a celebrity support team!

A few days later, Jesus took three of those disciples – Peter, James, and John – up a mountain, where they were given an out-of-this-world glimpse of God’s glory in the face of Jesus. Mark records that “His clothes became dazzling white, whiter than anyone in the world could bleach them. And there appeared before them Elijah and Moses, who were talking with Jesus.” (Mark 9:3-4) Any lingering doubts the three of them may have had about Jesus being the Son of God were in this moment erased.

And then Peter – in classic Peter open-mouth-insert-foot style (I think that’s why he’s my favorite) said to Jesus, “‘Rabbi, it is good for us to be here. Let us put up three shelters—one for you, one for Moses and one for Elijah.'” (Mark 9:5) From Peter’s perspective, this seemed like a good place to dwell – to stop and stay for a while. With all that potential suffering, rejection, and death in their future, this place seemed safe.

John 1:14 says, “The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us.” That word “dwelling” means Jesus stopped and stayed for a while – He put up His “tent” with us.* In Peter’s eyes, that “tent” needed to stay here and be his safe place. But what Peter didn’t know is what we know now – that because of Jesus’ death, resurrection, and ascension, His Spirit now “lives with you and will be in you.” (John 14:17) This word “lives” means to “stay” or “remain”.** If you’ve believed in Christ, He has become a moving-with-you refuge. Your ‘safe place’ now goes with you wherever you go!

Life – specifically life as a follower of Jesus – has a way of leaving you feeling exposed. Pain and suffering of any kind (especially the kind that comes with rejection) brings out our weaknesses and character flaws, leaving them bared before the world. It happened to Peter (Mark 14:66-72) and it happens to us, too.

It’s in this exposure that the heart’s true place of security is revealed. When a ‘tent’ I’ve been running to for safety ceases to exist, I’m reminded that the Spirit of God living in me is my only true refuge.

And even though I know this to be true, it boggles my mind that I don’t run to Him in the moments I need Him most. I wish I could “get it” – I wish I could snap my fingers and make Him my number-one go-to, but as author Brennan Manning states in his book, Ruthless Trust, “This kind of trust is acquired only gradually and most often through a series of crises and trials.” Every ounce of exposure we experience strips us of our man-made ‘shelters’ and deepens our dependence on Him alone.

I’m so thankful God has chosen to make His residence not in a geographic location, but with our moving selves. He’s a constant “shelter from the storm and a shade from the heat” (Isaiah 25:4) and even when we aren’t aware of His protection, it’s still there. Feeling exposed is scary, but you are always in your safe place!

*http://biblehub.com/greek/4637.htm
**http://biblehub.com/greek/3306.htm

It was a sunny, warm, Easter Sunday in southern Vermont and adventure was calling our name. There was no better time to check out a trail we’d never hiked before!

After Googling and mapping our route, we set off from Little Michigan Road and headed up the hill with enthusiasm – what a grand thing to be playing in snow piles while wearing t-shirts!

About an hour in, though, with the enthusiasm level quickly fading, it was clear our family was not up for the challenge of completing the intended loop. The increase in whining signaled the alarm to get back to the car pronto, but the usual dilemma was raised. You see, we Desilets have this thing – we never go back the way we came. I mean, what’s the point of seeing everything you just saw again?

“The creek is in that direction,” Tim suggested, “so if we bushwhack down this hill we’ll shortcut to the other end of the loop.” Concerned, I pulled out my phone to check the accuracy of this claim. (What would we do without Google Maps?) “Yep,” I replied, “as long as we head in that direction, we should be good.”

It’s important to note here that Vermont has a fifth season. It’s called “mud season” and it falls somewhere between winter and spring. As all that mountain snow melts, the water level in creeks and rivers rises and unpaved roads and paths can become impassable.

And what Google Maps could not show us was that between us and our destination was a giant mud-season generated swamp!

After a miserably failed it-seemed-like-a-good-idea-at-the-time attempt to cross this swamp, our even more whiny (and now cold and wet) crew wound through several groves of dense pine trees (in our t-shirts – Ouch!), and finally arrived at the other side.

Having a relationship with Jesus seems like it should be a well-marked path. Thousands – even millions – of people have done this before you, leaving their example. You look at the lives of believers you know and they seem to make it look easy – as if you should just be able to point your GPS in God’s direction, take a few steps and you’ll be there!

But like the Vermont woods, a relationship with Jesus is not drawn on two-dimensional map. There are no predictable, paved paths and everyone’s journey looks at least a little bit different. Unexpected twists and turns, miles of bushwhacking, and, of course, the occasional swamp can leave us wondering where we’re “at” and what may lie ahead.

In John 1:45-46, after being ‘found’ by Jesus (v. 43):

Philip found Nathanael and told him, “We have found the one Moses wrote about in the Law, and about whom the prophets also wrote—Jesus of Nazareth, the son of Joseph.”

“Nazareth! Can anything good come from there?” Nathanael asked.

“Come and see,” said Philip.

Nathanael didn’t know Jesus (and obviously had some preconceived notions about Him), but Jesus did know Nathanael:

When Jesus saw Nathanael approaching, he said of him, “Here truly is an Israelite in whom there is no deceit.”

“How do you know me?” Nathanael asked.

Jesus answered, “I saw you while you were still under the fig tree before Philip called you.”

Then Nathanael declared, “Rabbi, you are the Son of God; you are the king of Israel.” (v. 47-49)

Step inside this story for a moment and picture yourself in a crowded place. At some point, you’re introduced to this guy and he’s like “Oh yeah! I saw you a little while ago over by that tree!” Would you be impressed? Not really. You might think he had a some memory skills, but you certainly wouldn’t call him God in human flesh.

But when Nathanael heard Jesus say “I saw you while you were still under the fig tree,” he reacted by declaring, “Rabbi, you are the Son of God!” And that’s because Jesus didn’t just “see” Nathanael, He saw Nathanael. He saw whatever was going on in Nathanael’s head and heart at that moment.

Something significant was happening in Nathanael’s life under that fig tree. Maybe he was desperate and crying out to God for help. Maybe he was doubting. Maybe he was sinning. Whatever it was, it was something only God could know and Jesus in His fully-God self knew it, too.

No matter where Nathanael was “at,” Jesus knew his location. He knew exactly where Nathanael was at in his faith, his circumstances, his heart, and his mind. He knew what Nathanael had been through to get to that point – and He knew all that lay on the path ahead of him.

No matter where you’re “at,” Jesus knows your location. He knows everything you believe (or aren’t sure you believe), every doubt, every fear, every joy, every stress, every circumstance and how it’s affecting you. He sees you under your fig tree and He’s reaching out His hand to say, “Get up! Follow Me!”

A few weeks after Spring Break, our family was on another hike (this time on our home turf in PA) when we, yet again, decided to take another path that we thought would be a ‘better’ way back to our car. It wasn’t, of course, and after some backtracking and random-trail-guessing, we found the trail we were looking for – or so we hoped.

Concerned again, I referred to my handy dandy Google Maps app to make sure we were at least headed in the right direction. I was surprised to find that according to the map, we were lost in the middle of the forest!

But where we were standing was clearly a path!

Your GPS on your own life may not be as accurate as you think. Jeremiah 17:9 says, “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?” Our own hearts have the ability to deceive us on the condition of our own hearts! We are stuck in a two-dimensional map – while the world around us feeds us regular, just as off base, information on our location.

Only God knows where you’re “at”. He’s the only one who can view all the dimensions and pinpoint your exact location. You may think you’re miles from home, but maybe that fig tree you’re under is right where He is going to do a mighty work in your life. Or maybe you think you’re on the perfect path, but that pile of snow you’re standing on is about to turn into a foot-deep puddle of mud.

The only way to know is to ask the One who does know to “Search me, God, and know my heart”. (Psalm 139:23) If you’re like me, you spend enough time evaluating your soul, but not enough time asking God what He has to say about it. He knows where you’re at, so be still and listen!

(Originally posted May 2016)

Last week Tim and I spent a few days in Cancun, Mexico to celebrate our 15th anniversary (how are we this old?). After an unseasonably cold and wet Pennsylvania spring, my only stipulations on the destination of our trip were: WARM and SUNNY. Since “15” is a pretty big deal and we haven’t gone anywhere together in many years, we splurged… and it was worth every penny!

My favorite thing about Cancun, as I expected, was the ocean. I still can’t get over how blue the water was – it seemed unreal, like someone dumped boatloads of various shades of blue dye in it. No matter how much I hate that salty, sticky feeling, I couldn’t wait to go for a swim!

Unfortunately, the perfect swim I pictured in my head did not happen because the crashing waves were relentless! At the Jersey shore, where we do most of our beach swimming, after every group of three or four waves, there is usually a period of calm where you can make some forward progress.

But on this day in Cancun there were no such periods of calm. The waves were constant and strong! It seemed like every time I got a little deeper, I would just get knocked over and dragged back to shore. And then, before I could even stand up and wipe my eyes, I would get pummeled yet again! I just couldn’t win! My favorite sunglasses even found a new home at the bottom of the sea 😕

One of my favorite characters in the Bible is Jacob. A struggler from birth, Jacob wrestled with his brother, his father, his children, his circumstances, and his God. Though he was the beneficiary of the blessing and the heir to the leadership of his family, things rarely seemed to go his way.

After being born the second of a set of twins, Jacob fought and deceived his way to the top of his family. Unfortunately, his trickery came back to haunt him as his father-in-law then tricked him into 14 years of hard labor. Some time later, his beloved wife, Rachel, died and then his most beloved son, Joseph, was sold into slavery by his older brothers. Jacob (believing Joseph to be dead) “refused to be comforted. ‘No,’ he said, ‘I will continue to mourn until I join my son in the grave.'” (Genesis 37:35)

As if this wasn’t enough, a famine then overtook the land Jacob had settled his family in, the land God had promised this family for generations. Upon hearing that there was food in Egypt, though, Jacob sent his sons (except the youngest – Benjamin, the only remaining son of Rachel) to purchase food from there. His worst fears were confirmed when his sons returned with a report that they had been dealt harshly with by the “lord of the land” – that one son was being held prisoner and the only way to free him was to send Benjamin as proof that they were not spies.

“Their father Jacob said to them, ‘You have deprived me of my children. Joseph is no more and Simeon is no more, and now you want to take Benjamin. Everything is against me!'” (Genesis 42:36)

But what Jacob couldn’t see was that everything was actually going for him! The “lord of the land” was none other than Joseph himself and, not only was he soon to be reunited with his son, but his family was about to be spared certain death – for five more years of famine remained. These things that at first seemed to be knocking him over again and again were not against him at all.

As Joseph told his brothers, “For two years now there has been famine in the land, and for the next five years there will be no plowing and reaping. But God sent me ahead of you to preserve for you a remnant on earth and to save your lives by a great deliverance.” (Genesis 45:6-7)

In speaking of Joseph’s treatment of his brothers when they first came to Egypt to buy food, commentator Matthew Henry says, “God in His providence sometimes seems harsh with those He loves, and speaks roughly to those for whom yet He has great mercy in store.”*

Like you, I’ve had many days and even seasons of life where I felt like everything was going against me – days where I’ve questioned the “love” of this God I put my faith in. So many of the things we go through aren’t what we would see as the results of “love”, and, if He really is “in control”, then why does it feel like the waves of His ways are going against us?

Psalm 103:2-4 says:
“Bless the LORD, O my soul,
and forget not all his benefits,
who forgives all your iniquity,
who heals all your diseases,
who redeems your life from the pit,
who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy”

When we confess our belief in Christ and receive Him into our lives, it’s like stepping into the ocean of God’s benefits. The problem is that at first, all this healing, redemption, and mercy, doesn’t seem “beneficial” at all! It may even feel like it’s just one thing after another and that you barely have time to recover before something else hits. We often think, “If God really loves me, then why are these things happening to me?” – but it’s those things that seem to be against us that are actually the waves of His steadfast love and His constant work in our lives.

After losing my sunglasses on my first Cancun swimming adventure, I wasn’t too sure about venturing into the ocean again – the serene hotel pools seemed much safer. But I’m not one to back down from a challenge and I felt the need for redemption, so I gave it another try… and had a blast! Because I knew what I was getting myself into, frustration turned into joy, and I couldn’t stop laughing every time I got lambasted by a wave! It was probably my favorite memory from our trip.

When you step into a true relationship with God through Christ, you’re willingly walking into the waves of His steadfast love. This love is unlike the passive, emotion-based tolerance we’ve grown accustomed to in our society. This love is the “chesed” – the active, truth-based, lovingkindness and goodness – of a God who is above all things and really does know what is best for us and for His glory.**

I believe, in the end, or at least after some time, we’ll look back at the times we got knocked over and instead of pain, we’ll see healing. Instead of judgment, we’ll see mercy. Instead of frustration, we’ll see joy. We’ll see that the very things we thought were relentlessly against us were actually relentlessly for us.

“But as for me, my prayer is to you, O LORD.
At an acceptable time, O God,
in the abundance of your steadfast love answer me in your saving faithfulness…
Answer me, O LORD, for your steadfast love is good;
according to your abundant mercy, turn to me…
I will praise the name of God with a song;
I will magnify him with thanksgiving…
Let heaven and earth praise him,
the seas and everything that moves in them.”
(Psalm 69:13, 16, 30 & 34)

*Matthew Henry Commentary on the Whole Bible, Genesis 42. blueletterbible.org

**https://www.blueletterbible.org/lang/lexicon/lexicon.cfm?Strongs=H2617&t=ESV

(Originally posted April 2016)

As a mom of young children, my life could be defined by the word “mess”. Partly because cleaning is not really my thing, partly because I have three girls who like to change their clothes multiple times a day – but mostly because my children refuse to stop being creative! Yes, most of our mess concentrates in one area of our house: the craft cabinet.

As much as I love having creative children, creativity always seems to lead to a mess. Even if we get things all cleaned up and organized one day – the next day it looks like we never even tried!

One of the things that happens often as I make attempts to clean things up is that I will grab something that, to me, looks like scrap paper or leftovers from some project. But as I get ready to throw it away – I get caught: “No! Don’t throw that away! That’s my spy girls super decoder telescope!” A lot of times things that look like a mess to me are actually my children’s beautiful and wonderful creations.

A couple weeks ago, our youngest daughter, Anna, drew this picture. I noticed that she had worked especially hard on it, so instead of just throwing it in the overflowing box of miscellaneous projects and papers I’ll deal with someday (or sneaking it into the recycle bin) I decided to stop and ask her what it was.

On the bottom left is a cave, which is next to a parking lot with a flag. To the right of that are mountains – each color being a specific section of the mountains we had hiked a few days before. And of course, there are the clouds and sky. It may not look like much to anyone else – it may just look like some lines and scribbles – but to Anna, this was her creative way of capturing a beautiful and special family memory.

In Genesis 1 we are introduced to the most creative Artist that ever existed as He simply spoke and brought everything we know of into being. Then, as author Jennie Allen states, He “puts His hands in the dirt to craft a final masterpiece. This time, He didn’t use words. He lovingly fashioned man from the dust and woman from a rib.”*

We were not just spoken into being – we were formed. David reminds us of this in Psalm 139:13: “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.” The amazing thing, though, is that His creative work in our lives did not end there – He is constantly forming us.

The Grand Artist of all creation has chosen us to be His canvases. And although our lives may look like a mess of lines and scribbles and mistakes, He is creating a masterpiece. Every single mark is made with intention and out of the mess comes beauty – beauty that goes beyond anything we could ever dream up if we were the artist ourselves!

When I look at my children’s artwork sometimes, the ‘realist’ adult in me wants to say things like, “Oh – but mountains aren’t pink – they should be green or brown. And the sky? It’s not really just on top there, you should fill it in all the way down.” Because that’s what I see – and that’s what I think mountains and sky should look like.

The same runs true with life in general. When there’s a mess in my relationships or my work or my health or even just in my head – I just want to fix it. I want to make my life what I think my life should look like!

The other day my friend Tassie told a story about a mentor she once had. Every time the two of them would get together and Tassie would share a concern or problem she was facing, Sally would respond with, “Okay, let’s pray.” She would then open the prayer by thanking God for the situation and expressing how much she was looking forward to seeing what amazing things He was going to do through it!

The other day, I challenged myself to stand in the middle of my kids creative mess and just be. To pause and see the beauty in the mess. To just be the mom of these amazingly creative children.

God sees you in your mess. He sees you in your stress. He loves you in your mess and He cares for you in your stress. And even though you may not be able to see it now, He’s making beautiful things out of all of it.

So stop trying to be your own artist! Stop trying to clean it up, fix it all, or run away from it – and just BE. Be His canvas. Be His creation. Your Creator knows exactly what He’s doing.

*”IF: I Believe” (http://ifequip.com/content/i-believe-god-maker-earth-and-all-seen)

(Originally posted April 2016)

I’ve been pulled over a total of four times in my driving career – three of those times in the state of Vermont.

A year after getting points off of my driver’s test for stopping at a yellow light in Springfield, VT, I went through that same yellow light and got pulled over for it. Thankfully, I only received a warning and a reminder to be more careful!

15 years later, after living in Pennsylvania for over a decade, I was back in Vermont, ending an incredible two weeks of student missions. Instead of going back to PA with the group, we were going on vacation in northern VT. But first, we were headed out to breakfast with the fam.

The speed limit on most roads in rural Vermont is 50 mph. In suburban Philadelphia, though, we have approximately zero roads where the speed limit is 50. Where we live, the ‘slow’ roads are between 25 and 45 mph and the only faster roads are multi-lane highways, which are at least 55 mph. So, when we suburbanites end up on a 50 mph road, we tend to drift in one of those two directions.

On this day, I apparently thought I was on the expressway and was in total shock when I got pulled over for speeding. I had drifted right up to 65 without even noticing it! Thankfully, I again only received a warning and a reminder to be more careful…

Which was apparently not effective as less than 12 hours later, I got pulled over AGAIN! We just happened to be driving through the same town where I took my driver’s test and got my first warning all those years ago. But this time, instead of the light, I missed the sign showing the speed limit drop from 50 to 40. By some strange miracle (even after telling the officer I had already been pulled over that day) I again received a warning and a reminder to PAY ATTENTION!

Hebrews 2:1 says, “Therefore we must pay much closer attention to what we have heard, lest we drift away from it.” As drivers we know that it’s all too easy to drift – to allow our speed to gradually increase to unsafe levels or miss the clear signs and lights that are guiding us. And according to the writer of Hebrews, it’s just as easy to drift in our beliefs. In this passage, the writer warns readers that the even the small twists and tiny wavers of false teaching can end up causing big problems.

After over 15 years of ministry, Tim and I have experienced this sobering reality, not only in the lives of students, but adults as well.

The initial excitement of coming to know Christ or the ‘high’ of an intense spiritual experience may last for a few months or even years. During that time, everything is new – or at least comes with a new perspective. The Bible comes to life, worship songs are powerful, and your new found community of believers become your best friends. You’ve experienced God’s forgiveness, unconditional love, and now have a personal relationship with Him – it’s pretty much the best thing ever!

But, like all things, the newness wears off and the things that seemed to be so exciting and seemed to be working soon fade to ‘normal’. The overwhelming thought that you have so much to learn about God fades to ‘comfortable’. Those ‘high’ moments come fewer and farther between. The Bible – you kind of get the basic message of it all and there doesn’t really seem to be anything you haven’t heard yet. Worship used to bring you to your knees because you felt God’s nearness – but lately the songs haven’t been doing much for you. And the people you thought were the most amazing and welcoming and loving people ever? Well, they turned out to be not so amazing after all.

This is where the drift begins. Most people don’t just up and walk away – they simply start believing the small twists and tiny wavers on the truth that have slowly been creeping in. Twists like “the Bible is just a source of information,” wavers like “worship is about my personal experience,” or subtle turns like “the church exists to serve me”. It’s a gradual drift – and eventually that ‘faith’ they thought they had becomes a ‘phase’ they look back on.

Ten years ago, I took a two-year back-to-the-basics discipleship class at my church. After growing up in the church, spending my summers at a Christian camp, attending a Christian college, and working as a youth ministry director, it was easy to think I already knew it all or that there was no way I would ever drift. But taking that class revealed to me how little I actually knew about what I believed – and it was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made!

Yeah, it was intense. Yes, it was time consuming. Yep, there was homework. But it was in that class that I learned that the Bible, as God’s word, is “to be read as personal communication from Him” and seen as the place where I can constantly “discover new truths about living for Him.”* It’s where I learned that worship has very little to do with my feelings and everything to do with the fact that God desires and deserves all of my praise. It’s where I learned that “biblical community is based on the concept of giving to and receiving from other followers of Jesus.”**

Rather than just drifting through my relationship with God, I was forced to “pay much closer attention” to what I really believed, rather than being “tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes.” (Ephesians 4:14)

I’m sure you’re curious about that one time I got pulled over somewhere other than Vermont. It happened less than a mile from my house – on a road I drove almost every day. I was on my way to church in my ‘new mom’ days and blew right through a stop sign. I didn’t even know I had done it until I saw the flashing lights behind me!

If you’re feeling comfortable in your faith, this is your warning ticket. If it’s all starting to feel ‘normal’ and ‘everyday’, here’s your pink slip. The temptation to drift – to start believing those minor deceptions that eventually become major – is greatest when we’re close to home. So get uncomfortable – sign up for a class, find a more mature believer who will disciple you, or if you’ve already done that, find someone that you can disciple. You may think this is unnecessary, but until you start paying “much more attention,” you’ll never know what you’ve been missing!

*Design for Discipleship 2: “The Spirit-Filled Follower of Jesus” p. 48
**p. 89
(Check out the whole Design for Discipleship series at http://www.navigatorstores.com/)

(Originally posted April 2016)

“Mommy, you’re fat!”

Although this was not a totally shocking comment from my not-afraid-to-be-brutally-honest four-and-a-half-year-old, I turned around and quickly retorted:

“Excuse me! We do NOT say things like that in our family!”

As I was saying this, I realized both of my girls were pointing and laughing hysterically – not at me, but at my reflection in the convenience store restroom hand dryer. The curves in the shiny metal surface of the dryer showed a distorted, squished and, therefore, widened version of myself that was, of course, totally worthy of laughter!

Mirrors. What would we do without them? Having the ability to see a clear reflection of our appearance is something we take for granted in our modern world. We don’t have to depend on still water or polished metal to know what we look like – we can get an accurate view whenever we want!

A warped mirror, however, like the distorted image in the hand dryer or those playground fun mirrors, does not give an accurate reflection. You would never put a mirror like that in your house – well, maybe for fun, but not because you were depending on it to know what you look like!

This week I pulled out my 8th grade yearbook page (yes, in my small town Vermont class of 25 students we all got our own page!). Each student was assigned the task of finding and filling their page with photos, words, symbols, or quotes (remember there was no internet and no fancy printers in those days…) that gave others a picture of who we were and what we were all about.

Looking back at my page cracks me up now because, of course, I was in 8th grade and had no clue who I really was! I thought I was all about recycling and world peace, art and music, and “dreaming a better world”. I may have cared about those things some – but really, all I was doing was looking at the world around me and trying to become what I thought they wanted me to be.

I was looking in the wrong mirrors.

When we look to the world around us, expecting to see who we are, how we’re doing, or who we’re supposed to be – all we get are warped reflections. Because every one of those mirrors has an angle – especially the world of social media (which I’m so glad didn’t exist when I was in 8th grade – can I get an “amen”?!)

Even though all these years later I know who I really am, I still find it tempting to just take a quick glance at what’s out there every once in a while.

Some days I see a reflection of “not active or healthy enough”. Often I see a reflection of “not enough of an activist“. I see a reflections of “not hip enough,” “not funny enough,” and “not creative enough”. And, of course, you can’t scroll through your news feed lately without being told that 17 reasons everything you’ve ever thought was incorrect or 18 ways everything you’ve ever done could have been done better.

It’s exhausting! Looking for your reflection among these mirrors only leaves you feeling stressed and depressed. Whatever reflections of yourself you’re seeing out there in our world of comparison, remember that they’re distorted. Squished. Widened. Angled. They’re not accurate.

The only way to get a clear view is to turn your eyes to the One who formed you and knows you better than you’ll ever know yourself. It’s in knowing Him that we “find” ourselves – because it’s in knowing Him that we begin to understand His work.

The more you look at God, the more you’ll understand that He does everything with purpose – and that He never makes mistakes. The more you look at God, the more you’ll be in awe of His ways – and the more you’ll learn to trust that you are “fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:14). The more you look at God, the more you’ll see that He works more in the unseen than the seen, and that “He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.” (Philippians 1:6) And the more you look at Him, the more you’ll be aware of the fact that “God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases Him.” (Philippians 2:13) Because of Christ, you are enough.

“O LORD, you have examined my heart and know everything about me.” (Psalm 139:1) God, thank you for forming me so well, knowing me so well, and working in me so well. Help me to keep my eyes on you and trust that it’s only Your reflection of me that counts. Amen.

(Originally posted March 2016)

An elementary school noon dismissal plus a sunny day over 60 degrees means one thing – time for a Desilets Family Adventure! Last Friday was a perfect day to kick off the spring season with a hike, and we took full advantage of the opportunity. We packed some water and snacks, picked up the kids, and traded suburbia for this:

We all marched with excitement a mile straight up the rocky Appalachian trail, and were treated at the end to some sweet boulder climbing and an awesome view of the valley below.

And a mile straight up a rocky trail makes for an even more fun trip down! The older girls and I took the lead, and, since the potential for falls is much greater in this direction, Tim grabbed our less-experienced (and somewhat reckless) 4-year-old’s hand to help her navigate the path down. After a full day of activity, we were nearing serious preschooler meltdown zone and I decided this would be a great job for “Daddy” – because even a tiny stumble could mean “Carry me!” the rest of the way down.

But as we neared the bottom, instead of hearing whining or crying, all I heard from the back of the line was giggling. I turned around to see Anna running, skipping, and courageously leaping off of rocks – completely free and secure in the confidence that her Daddy had her hand and would not let her fall.

There’s been a lot of talk in the Christian world lately about being “brave” – about facing our fears and taking those next steps God is asking us to take with courage – rather than cowering under the excuses of our weaknesses, the guilt of our failures, and the ease of comfort zones.

As a frequent cower-er myself, I want so badly to face life with the courage of those great heroes I read about in the Bible and in the history of God’s people. I wonder if I would have had the boldness of David, the resolution of Daniel, or the fearlessness of Joshua if I had been in their shoes. It’s hard to imagine, though, when I can barely muster up the guts to take those ‘next steps’ of obedience in my daily life!

It makes total sense that “fear not” is the most frequently spoken command from God in His word, because one of our most basic instincts is self-protection. It’s just plain natural for us to cower and hide. The potential for falls, failure, and even simple discomfort are enough to make us take it slow – or even stand still. Most of us probably don’t even realize how many of our daily choices (or lack thereof) are rooted in fear!

Some of the most familiar verses referred to when we talk about courage are found in God’s promises to Joshua and the people of Israel. In Deuteronomy 31:6, Moses says: “Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the LORD your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.” The reason they were not to fear was not because there was nothing to fear – but rather because their God would be with them.

The Hebrew term for God being with (and therefore not leaving) them has to do with a letting go or throwing down, specifically from the hand*. For example, the same word is used in Joshua 10:6, “And the men of Gibeon sent to Joshua at the camp in Gilgal, saying, ‘Do not relax your hand from your servants. Come up to us quickly and save us and help us.'”

Being brave does not come from strength we find within ourselves, from circumstances that we predict will lean in our favor, or from guarantees of success. Instead, like Anna’s downhill joy-run, being brave means trusting that the hand that is holding you will never relax, never take a break, and never let you go.

You might think this happy sight lasted all the way down the hill, but, of course, as soon as I pulled out my camera, this happened:

Yes, she fell. Yes, there was pain. Yes, there were tears. But, no, her Daddy did not relax his grasp or let go of her hand for even a second – in fact his grip may have actually tightened.

We all have a next step of obedience that God is leading us to take. Maybe it’s to put your faith in Him for the first time or to turn your entire life over to Him – not just part of it. Maybe it’s going public and getting baptized or sharing your faith with a friend. Maybe it’s joining a small group, reading the Bible, praying out loud, finding a ministry to serve in, or tithing. Maybe it’s forgiving someone who hurt you, showing love to someone in your neighborhood, or opening your home to a child in need. Most of us already know what this step is, but something is preventing us from taking it – the root of it likely being some sort of fear.

But what do we have to fear when God is with us? Why do we hold back when we know that His strong hand is so firmly gripped to ours? You and I can take our next steps with confidence and joy, not because we can’t fall (we very well might!) but because we know He’ll be holding on tight the whole time.

When Anna fell on the trail, I doubted there would be any recovery from this turn of events. I was sure that Tim would be carrying her the rest of the way and we could say goodbye to the laughter and hello to a constant stream of tears.

But, believe it or not, a less than two minutes later she was right back at it again. Her Daddy had not only held her hand the whole time, but he was also the one who picked her up, the one who wiped her tears, and the one who encouraged her to get down and try again.

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
Isaiah 41:10

Be brave! Grand adventures await…

*http://www.blueletterbible.org

“If you use a rescue inhaler two or more times a week, your asthma is not well-controlled and you should talk to your doctor.”

When I heard the words of this TV commercial as a college student, I laughed. “What are they talking about? I use my inhaler every day and my asthma is totally under control! That’s ridiculous!”

But a few months later, when my doctor started me on the very medication that commercial was advertising, I realized how wrong I was. “The important thing” she said, “is that you take it every day, even if your symptoms aren’t bad – it needs to build up in your system in order to be effective in preventing asthma symptoms.”

And she was right. I can now count on one hand the number of times I use my rescue inhaler every year – and the times I have to use it are only because I’ve been neglecting my daily medicine.

Around that same time, having recently committed my life to Christ, I was spending time every day reading a devotional, journaling, and praying. My relationship with God was growing and I was learning what it meant to do everyday life with Him.

But then one day a friend said to me, “It’s great that you’re doing that, but be careful you don’t get legalistic about it!”

As a student at a Christian college, “legalism” was a four-letter-word. The last thing I wanted was for my relationship with God to become about regiment and rules! I didn’t want anyone to think I was just doing it because that’s what “good Christians” did or to show that I was somehow better than them. I know my friend meant well, but for me this was the beginning of the end.

I started missing days here and there. Then weeks here and there. College life was busy and the homework was endless. Pretty soon I got a boyfriend and an internship. Which turned into a husband and a job and full-time ministry life. Oh yeah, and then we had kids.

During those years, my time with God and His Word came in fits and spurts – when I was working on lessons, doing Bible study homework, or when I knew I needed God’s help. It was my rescue inhaler. I knew the daily dose would be better, but I didn’t really have time and besides, I didn’t want to be legalistic about it. If I wasn’t really feeling it, I didn’t want to force it.

By the summer of 2012, though, I was struggling – gasping for air because the ‘rescue inhaler’ wasn’t working anymore.

That was when my friend Kathleen approached me about joining an online accountability group for women who were committed to spending regular time with God before starting their days.* It sounded crazy (and maybe even legalistic), but I knew it was time for a change, so first I laughed at her (I’m NOT a morning person) and then I signed up.

And it was exactly what the doctor ordered:

“The law of the LORD is perfect, refreshing the soul. The statutes of the LORD are trustworthy, making wise the simple. The precepts of the LORD are right, giving joy to the heart. The commands of the LORD are radiant, giving light to the eyes.” (Psalm 19:7-8)

It turns out I desperately needed this medicine!

When I started my new daily asthma medication all those years ago, I had trouble remembering to take it, so I made a note and taped it up on my dorm room wall. It may have seemed a little silly for a 22-year-old to need this, but I had to start somewhere! I knew it would eventually become habit, but for now I had to force it.

The funny thing is that once I saw the benefits of the medicine and how much it improved the quality of my days – I didn’t need the reminders anymore! Taking it just became part of my daily life.

No matter how much I didn’t want to force myself to spend regular time with God, I had to start somewhere. So even though I dreaded the thought of getting up early (or even worse – putting aside my to-do list and going to bed early), I set my alarm and just did it.

And once I saw the benefits – how much it improved the quality of my life and my relationship with God – my perspective changed. I still need an alarm (yep, still NOT a morning person), but when I go to bed at night, I actually can’t wait to get up because I look forward to my “Jesus time” so much!

Yes, even if my ‘symptoms’ aren’t bad, I still take my (almost) daily dose. The effects may not be immediate and visible, but I know God’s Word is being built up in my system. It may have started out as a regimen, but now it’s my life. You can call it “legalism” all you want, but it’s my medicine – and I don’t know what I’d do without it!

*www.hellomornings.org

As a family, we believe that life is meant to be an adventure. When our kids look back at their childhoods, we hope that they will not only see a highlight reel of outdoor adventure experiences, but also be convinced that every day life also holds the potential for great challenge and thrill!

Thus far, our plan appears to be working. Maybe a little too well…

Unfortunately, along with every adventure comes risk. Yes, we do a lot of fun stuff, but it never comes without the chance that someone will get hurt. We’ve certainly had our fair share of bumps and bruises, cuts and scrapes, and, of course, the tears that come along with them.

But one of our other great ambitions as parents is to teach our children the value of choice. We operate, as Tim calls it, on a “challenge by choice” basis – meaning if you don’t want to participate, that is your choice. But if you do choose to participate, you must understand that “risky activity may lead to potentially painful consequences”. You may get hurt, but you must understand that you took that risk!

So, when you decide you want to try ‘snowboarding’ on a plastic sled down an icy, hard driveway, you may experience quite a thrill! But you also may end up falling flat on your back – OUCH!

And making yourself a snowbank-chair where you can get a front-row seat on your sisters’ antics is never a risk-free activity…

After over 20 years of being a member of the body of Christ and actively serving in this body, I’ve learned that ministry is never a risk-free activity. Getting involved in what God is doing in the hearts and lives of others can be thrilling – there’s nothing like witnessing God on the move and knowing you were a part of it! However, the adventures of serving God never come without possibility of painful consequences.

After all:

You may be taken advantage of. Having a heart that is willing to serve wherever, whenever is key. But since those hearts are few and far between, that often gives you a fast forward to the top of the volunteer list. Others may even decide you’re so willing and so good at what you do, you must not need them anymore (and *poof* they’re gone!).

Your efforts may go unnoticed. The majority of ministry happens behind the scenes and the time, energy, and heart that you pour into a person, group of people, or task may never be recognized. You may never be thanked or honored – in fact all you may ever get are complaints because…

Someone may disagree with what you’re doing or the way you’re doing it. No matter how confident you are, it’s still no fun to be told you’re wrong. Though most critics are well-meaning on some level, there’s a strong possibility the good you are doing will take a back seat to what they think you could be doing better. And speaking of people…

You may be hurt by someone you serve or serve with. The church is full of broken people, which means your chances of exposure to brokenness (and therefore hurt) in ministry are right around 100%.

You may mess something up. Since you and I are among those broken and flawed people, we don’t always make the best choices. Even those of us who diligently strive to seek and obey God in our ministry activities still have our judgment clouded by self and rush and fear every once in a (short) while. In other words, this one’s a guarantee!

You may even find out it’s not your gifting after all. Those first steps of getting involved in a ministry are often hindered by the nagging questions of “What if I’m not good at that?” or “How do I even know what I’m good at?”. Yes, there’s at least a small possibility that all the effort and time and energy you poured into a specific ministry may feel like a waste when you find out it’s just not your thing.

And finally, your ministry may appear ineffective. Since most of God’s work happens in the heart – in the deep places of the soul that are not visible to the general public, and since God isn’t in a rush like we are, the probability of you seeing that immediate, visible ‘fruit’ you think you need to see is low. Even if you are seeing some ‘results,’ they will rarely feel proportionate to the effort you’re putting in!

As parents, we recently added a new ending to this much repeated family phrase. It now goes something like this: “Risky activity? Potentially painful consequences. Totally worth it.” When I say this to my girls as they’re deciding whether or not to try something (or more often after the tears of failure or injury have ensued), I’m reminding them that the experience of adventure trumps the “OUCH!” that might happen as a result.

When I accepted Christ and then committed my life to ministry, I was ready for adventure! I knew I would be ‘stretched’ and ‘challenged’, but my naive self had no idea the kind of risk I was taking! I can safely say I’ve experienced everything on this list – and since I’m not done yet, I’m sure there’s plenty more to come.

But it’s been totally worth it! Even knowing that one person came to know Jesus or grew in their relationship with Him – and that I was a part of that – makes it worth all the pain on the other side. As 3 John 1:4 states: “I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.” Other than the joy of knowing God ourselves, there is no greater thrill than the experience of seeing others come to know Him – or know Him better!

Yes, you may be taken advantage of and your hard work may never be appreciated. Yes, the critics may arise and the relationships might get tricky. Yes, you will make mistakes and it may even feel like you’re wasting your time. But it’s your choice. The risk of bumps and bruises, cuts and scrapes – oh yeah, and the tears that come with them – is real, but I think you’ll find the adventure is totally worth it!