Repost: Clear

(Originally posted March 2017)

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There’s nothing like a cool August morning on Lake Groton in northern Vermont. You just can’t beat waking up in a lakeside cabin, grabbing a cup of coffee, and walking outside to take in the crystal clear view of green mountains reflecting in undisturbed waters.

One morning last summer, though, the view was anything but clear:

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Thick, heavy fog had completely covered the lake surface, making it impossible to see the other side – or even the lake itself!

When I first walked outside, the only things visible were the dock and chairs. But as the morning went on and the warmth of the sun evaporated the mist, things began to appear.

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With every minute that passed, more was visible. The trees became greener and the blue of the sky was increasingly revealed.

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After about an hour, the last of the low-lying clouds retreated and our view was fully restored.

Isaiah 44:22 says: “I have swept away your offenses like a cloud, your sins like the morning mist. Return to me, for I have redeemed you.” This verse is such a fascinating picture of God’s work in our lives! The disorienting sinful nature we are born with continually clouds our judgment, leaving us in a fog when it comes to right and wrong. And not only that, it also obscures our view of God and His work in our lives.

But because of His great love, we who were once “strangers,” unknowingly “alienated from God” and “darkened in [our] understanding,” have had our eyes opened so that we might be “reconciled” and, therefore, “brought near”*. When our sin is “swept away” by the blood of Christ, our view of God is no longer hindered by its haze.

The thought that I – a tiny little human – could somehow be given a even glimpse of the splendor and majesty of the God of the Universe boggles my mind! Unfortunately, though, it’s hard to be content with a glimpse because I want to see it all – I so want to understand God and mostly, I want to know exactly what He’s doing in my life. But like the clearing of the mist, God’s revelation of His work never happens all at once.

In Mark 8:22-25, there is a story of a blind man whose sight was restored by Jesus:

They came to Bethsaida, and some people brought a blind man and begged Jesus to touch him. He took the blind man by the hand and led him outside the village. When he had spit on the man’s eyes and put his hands on him, Jesus asked, “Do you see anything?”
He looked up and said, “I see people; they look like trees walking around.”
Once more Jesus put his hands on the man’s eyes. Then his eyes were opened, his sight was restored, and he saw everything clearly.

Notice that Jesus’ work in the blind man’s situation happened in two stages. He was given sight, but at first he could only see partially. It was in Jesus’ continued work where the man’s vision was fully restored and he could see everything – including his Healer – clearly.

Oh, the depth of the riches of the wisdom and knowledge of God!
How unsearchable his judgments,
and his paths beyond tracing out!

(Romans 11:33)

God’s work in our lives is often exactly that – “unsearchable” and “beyond tracing out”. This is frustrating for us, but He doesn’t work like a television show where all the pieces come together, the answers are revealed, and the mystery is solved in an hour or less. Sure, we hear stories of people looking back and seeing clearly how God worked in a situation, but that doesn’t mean that’s a guarantee for us. There may be many things we never understand.

In Isaiah 44, prior to the verse mentioned above, God goes into detail describing the exact sin His people, Israel, were guilty of:

“The blacksmith takes a tool
and works with it in the coals;
he shapes an idol with hammers,
he forges it with the might of his arm.”

(Isaiah 44:12)

The idols God’s people had chosen over Him were gods made with human hands – they were gods originating in human minds whose ways fit into human understanding.

As author Peter Scazzero describes: “God is immanent (so close) and yet transcendent (so utterly above and far from us). God is knowable, yet he is unknowable. God is inside us and beside us, yet he is wholly different from us… Most of the time we have no idea what God is doing.”** If we’re going to call Him our “God”, then we must come to terms with the fact that He is not required to work only in the realm of our human perception!

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Looking back, that morning at Lake Groton was anything but disappointing, because even in the fog, the view was still worth looking at! The process was beautiful and in rushing it we would have missed out on an amazing experience.

Clearly, God is more interested in the process than the product because, as Jesus illustrated in His healing of the blind man, the process involves the greater thing. The experience of His loving touch as He continues His work in our lives will always outweigh the lesser product of our understanding of it.

*Ephesians 2:12, Colossians 1:21, and Ephesians 4:18, Acts 26:18, Colossians 1:22, Ephesians 2:13
**”Emotionally Healthy Spirituality”, p. 129

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Repost: Stickers

(Originally posted February 2017)

Their stickiness is irresistible – setting them apart from simple, plain, boring pieces of paper. Glittery stars and hearts, or better yet your favorite Disney characters, and you can attach them to things!

As a mom, I have a love/hate relationship with stickers. They are a fun prize, an easy activity, and our motivation to survive those long waits in the doctor’s office. But when they don’t do what they’re supposed to do – when they don’t stick because they’ve lost their stickiness (after being moved 17 times in the car ride home) – they result in great frustration!

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One of the hardest things about growing in our faith is that the things we learn seem to have a hard time sticking. We listen to a sermon, read a quote, or hear a song that moves and inspires us. We are reminded of a truth about God or see ourselves in a new way because of what He’s done and we know we’ll remember those words forever!

But by the next day (or even the next hour) the details of life and work and family have invaded and we’ve moved on. I always have really high hopes after I read the Bible in the morning that “THIS time I’m gonna make it stick!” And then the next morning I open to where I left off and realize I never thought about it again!

Mark 8 tells the story of Jesus miraculously transforming a small amount of food into enough to satisfy several thousand hungry people. We love this story because not only does it prove that Jesus had God’s supernatural power, but it also shows that He embodied God’s great compassion.

In those days, when again a great crowd had gathered, and they had nothing to eat, he called his disciples to him and said to them, “I have compassion on the crowd, because they have been with me now three days and have nothing to eat. And if I send them away hungry to their homes, they will faint on the way. And some of them have come from far away.” Mark 8:1-3

Jesus knew that with this many people in such a “desolate place,” (v. 4) His supernatural power was their only hope for food – so He made it happen: “And they ate and were satisfied.” (v. 8) Amazing! Everyone was not only fed, but they were full!

So now it was time to settle in and let Jesus continue teaching, right? That’s the picture I always had in my head, but verse 9 says that after they picked up the leftover food, “he sent them away”. He gave them the food so that they could go!

As we see from verses 1-3, the provision was meant to prepare them for the journey. They couldn’t stay there forever with Him – not just for logistics’ sake – but because His words for them were not meant to just be heard! They were meant to stick by being applied to their daily lives.

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One of the true marks of motherhood is going out somewhere, noticing that people are looking at you a little strange, and realizing there’s a random sticker stuck to your arm or better yet – in your hair! It may be embarassing, but it also makes me smile to think of my girls and wonder who decided I needed to be decorated that day.

A couple months ago, I committed to praying daily for a specific list of people in my life. I’ve never been good at remembering to pray for others, so I decided to set reminders in my phone every hour or so throughout the day. This seemed like a great idea, but after a couple days I was beginning to get overwhelmed as I thought about how I could best pray for each person. I knew if I didn’t make a change soon, I would just end up giving up!

One day, after closing my Bible and having a “That was so good! I hope I remember it all day!” thought, my first prayer reminder notification went off. I was in a hurry, so since the thoughts from my study were fresh in my mind, I decided to pick one, narrow it down to a simple phrase, and pray that for the first person on my list. Then I used the same phrase for each person I prayed for that day.

And guess what? You can’t pray the same phrase 12 times in a day without remembering it and without thinking about how it applies to your own life. All of a sudden what I read in the morning was finally sticking throughout my day!

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This weekend we had company coming from out of town, which called for a kids’ bedroom cleaning. If you’ve been upstairs in our house, you know this is big deal! Our three girls share a room and the bigger they get, the more stuff they accumulate – which means the floor of their room is a rare sight.

When things were picked up, I stood back to take in the view (because it may only last a day) and noticed at least seven old stickers stuck to the wood floor! For all the times you want something to stick and it won’t, these stickers are stuck because years of daily life have walked all over them. They are pretty much ground into that floor and not coming off anytime soon!

“Oh, how I love your law! I meditate on it all day long.” (Psalm 119:97) God’s words can not only satisfy our hearts and minds as we read them, but they also have the ability to remain in our thoughts as we go. It may take some effort on our part, but when we apply His words to the mess and chaos of daily life (especially when we feel like life is walking all over us), that’s when they really start to stick!

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Repost: Aha!

(Originally posted February 2017)

When my friend Sue and I drove into Canyonlands National Park in southeastern Utah, we were in need of a break. After three days of driving, crowded parks, and catching up on each other’s lives, these introverts needed some quiet time – and Sue’s “Secrets of the National Parks” book showed us exactly where to go.

The trail to the “White Rim Overlook” was a short 8/10 of a mile to a majestic view of the canyon. Most people visiting parks like this head straight for the “famous” views or hikes, so the parking lot for this trail was almost empty. There were no people in sight and it was remarkably quiet – Perfect!

We quickly parked, grabbed our stuff, and headed out. After seeing the sign for the trail, we continued on, following the small rock tower ‘cairns’ that marked the path.

After a few minutes, though, we started having trouble. In our experience thus far, the National Park trails were well marked – at every turn there was a cairn and any place you might be tempted to veer off was blocked off. But this trail was all over the place and the markers seemed few and far between!

At one point our hike came to a halt – we couldn’t see a trail marker anywhere! Since we were not interested in getting lost that day (especially when no one else was around), we had a couple options: Keep moving and risk getting lost or retrace our steps to find the trail again.

I’m not one to give in and go back, so I took the next step in front of me and “Aha!” – there it was. That mere 2 and 1/4 feet (or whatever my stride length is) made all the difference – the next cairn was now in plain sight and we were on our way!

What do you do when you don’t know what to do? I know I have moments every week where I feel at least slightly lost, overwhelmed, or just unsure of what the right choice is. I always wish in that moment that I had someone who could show me – with 100% assurance – what my next step should be.

When Paul prayed for the church at Collosae, he knew that one of the things they needed most was God’s direction and guidance, so he prayed that they would “be filled with the knowledge of His will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding” (Colossians 1:9). Paul knew that God was the only one with that 100% assurance and His desire was to “fill” His followers with His perspective.

The thing is that it’s not just about knowing what to do – it’s about actually doing it. As Paul went on, he mentioned why God would give the knowledge of His will: “so as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to Him: bearing fruit in every good work” (Colossians 1:10a). The knowledge, wisdom, and understanding they received from God was meant to define their stride as they walked.

And then if they did that, something really cool would happen – they would end up “increasing in the knowledge of God” (Colossians 1:10b). It turns out that it’s a cycle: God gives the knowledge, we act on it, and then He gives us more! “Aha!” Knowing what to do in the unclear only becomes clear after we do what we already know to be true. As Ellicott’s commentary suggests: “Do and thou shalt know”.*

Recently, I was at an event for one of my kids and in my sitting-there-forever-waiting boredom, I opened Facebook (mistake number one). It had already been a stressful day, so I was hoping for some fun pictures of my friends and their families to make me smile (why would I ever think that?). But instead, I clicked on something I never should have clicked on (why do I do these things?) and read words that I could never unread.

I quickly spiraled into panic-mode. I was trapped in a room full of people and I couldn’t get in touch with my husband (who normally calms me down in these moments). I couldn’t stop the words from running over and over in my brain and I felt totally lost – I was overwhelmed and I didn’t know what to do. I prayed and prayed, “God, why is this happening? What do I do? Please help! I need Your peace!”

But a few minutes later, instead of feeling peace, I started feeling like God was telling me to go talk to another mom at the event. “Are you kidding me?” I thought, “I’m a mess! I don’t even know her and You’re expecting me to do this NOW? You give me the peace first and then maybe I’ll do it.” I sat there stubbornly for the next few minutes thinking I must have heard Him wrong – surely He wouldn’t expect this socially-awkward introvert to do something like this on a day like today!

But… I did it anyway. And guess what? Half an hour later I had pretty much forgotten about my stress – I had had a wonderful conversation, learning about someone else’s life instead of focusing on my own, and “Aha!” – it was there that God gave me the peace.

There are so many times that we don’t know what to do – times where we feel lost and overwhelmed and we want God’s help! We want Him to fix the problem or at least show us what we need to do to fix it! Last week, as my friend Emma and I were studying this passage, she said, “Sometimes we just can’t let go of our stressful situations because we don’t think we can move on until it’s all fixed. We have to get THIS taken care of first! But maybe it doesn’t work that way.”

The problem is that God’s “will” is not my happiness and comfort. His will, according to Colossians 1, is Jesus. So instead of the peace we’re expecting, according to author and speaker Jill Briscoe, “He gives you courage”.** And every time I use that courage to obey the next step He has put in front of me, even if it’s just one single stride, and even if it’s in a completely different direction than I first thought, “Aha!” – He opens my eyes up to even more of who He is.

At the end of our White Rim Overlook hike, Sue and I stopped to look at the trail sign that we had blown by in our rush to start the hike. “Aha!” There was a good reason for our confusion – we had taken the wrong path! We assumed the trail went straight ahead when, in reality, it went to the right. Thankfully, in our confusion and wrong turns, the paths had met up and we did not end up on the 2.7 mile “Gooseberry Trail”!

I love these verses from the book of Job: “Who is this that obscures my plans with words without knowledge?… Where were you when I laid the earth’s foundation? Tell me, if you understand… Surely you know, for you were already born! You have lived so many years!” (Job 38:2, 4 & 21)

In our limited human knowledge and wisdom we tend to think things should be done a certain way – especially when we’re overwhelmed. But when we ask God for His knowledge, we can expect His direction might differ from the way we thought we should go. It may even be completely the opposite!

What situation do you need God’s guidance in today? The word for “understanding” in Colossians 1:9 comes from the idea of two rivers meeting – it means “a putting together in the mind”.*** So ask God to pour into you the knowledge of His will, meet it with a step of obedience, and get ready for the “Aha!” on the other side!

*http://biblehub.com/commentaries/ellicott/colossians/1.htm
**IF:Gathering 2017
***http://biblehub.com/greek/4907.htm

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Repost: Timing

(Originally posted January 2017)

Now that the holidays are over, it’s time to think about one thing: Summer! It’s almost here, people – warm weather and outdoor adventure are right around the corner! Or at least we can dream about it, right?

Every July our family has the huge privilege of being able to spend several weeks in southern Vermont. We love being able to escape the Pennsylvania humidity and experience the beauty of those Green Mountains!

Last summer, my mom introduced us to a rope swing she had discovered on a creek near her town. Far from the old-piece-of-knotted-string-tied-to-a-questionably-stable-branch you may be picturing, this swing was the real deal – complete with a wooden handle and attached securely to the bridge above. The kids had a blast swinging off the rocks, letting go, and plunging into the water!

But no matter how much fun it was, it was also an accident waiting to happen. An adult needed to be in the water directly below the swing – not only to catch the handle and get it to the next kid – but also to stop any kids who didn’t let go from careening back into the rocks!

If you’ve ever been on a rope swing before, you know that timing is everything. There is a very small window at the peak of your upward swing where you must let go if you want that optimal high-flying-plunge experience. Letting go too early just leaves you with a lame slip into the water and holding on for too long can be outright dangerous!

Another thing we’re all thinking about at this time of year is change. There’s something about the start of a new year that gives us hope that things will be different – or at least that we’ll be different. We’re ready to grab that handle and step off the rock, hoping that this will be the year we take that perfect high-flying-plunge into life.

But timing is everything.

If you’re human like me, you have regular moments of crisis – moments where you’ve done something you regret or where the Holy Spirit has revealed to you a pattern of sin or selfishness in your life. Man, it hurts to feel like you’ve betrayed yourself and those “I want to be a better person” and “I don’t ever want that to happen again” thoughts can seem to overwhelm for hours – or even days.

But no matter how badly we want to change, if we don’t take a proactive and practical step toward change within those hours or days, the ‘crisis’ will fade and we will default right back to the way we were before.

In preparation for our high school small group study this January, I’ve been reading through the book of Mark. One of the unique features of this book is the sense of urgency portrayed in the text. The words “immediately” and “at once” are used over and over, emphasizing the movement of Jesus as He traveled, taught, healed, and led.

But it wasn’t just about His action. Mark 1:16-18 shows His followers acting with similar urgency:

Passing alongside the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and Andrew the brother of Simon casting a net into the sea, for they were fishermen. And Jesus said to them, “Follow me, and I will make you become fishers of men.” And immediately they left their nets and followed him.

The window of opportunity for this change in their lives was very small – there were no days or even hours to weigh the options, pray about it, or just hope for the best. A decision needed to be made right away and if they had held onto their nets for even a few moments longer, they would have missed out!

Anyone who’s been on a rope swing before will tell you that that hardest thing to do (if you’re even able to hold on in the first place 😉) is to get yourself to let go at that critical point. It always feels safer to hold on for just a little bit longer!

In order for change in our lives to be real and lasting, a proactive and practical step must be taken at that critical point. But like Simon and Andrew – taking that step can’t happen while we’re holding on to our nets. Our lives only have so much room, so adding that new habit or taking a step toward changing that pattern is always going to require letting go of something else.

For me, I’ve noticed several instances over the past month where instead of being “quick to listen and slow to speak” with my family, I did the exact opposite – most of the time because I was distracted by the device in my hand. So starting today, after school time is no-phone time because something’s gotta go!

As we jump into this new year, have you sensed the Holy Spirit leading you to make a change? What’s one practical step you could take today to make that change a reality? What’s one thing might you have to let go of in order to take that step?

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Repost: Match

(Originally posted November 2016)

From the day Tim and I met playing Ultimate Frisbee at Eastern College, games have been a part of our family. We place high value on competition and, of course, can’t get enough of the ‘thrill of victory’!

As our kids get older, we are loving being able to introduce them to new games and show them how much fun a little healthy competition can be. Unfortunately, as is the case with most games, the experience of losing is much more common than the ‘thrill of victory’ and the majority of our matches end in tantrums and tears!

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One of our favorite games of late is “Go Fish”. This simple matching game is quick enough to play several rounds in one sitting (meaning each player will likely experience both loss and victory) and it’s also an easy one for game-savvy parents to manipulate the outcome of 😉.

If you aren’t familiar with the basic rules of “Go Fish,” each player is dealt a hand of cards with the goal of finding pairs of the same number. Each time you have a pair in your hand, you remove those cards from your hand. You then take turns asking other players if they have a certain card that matches one from your own hand. If they have the card, they give it to you, and you have a match! If they don’t, they say “Go Fish!” and you pick from the pile of extra cards (which may work out in your favor if you “Fish your wish!”). The first player to find matches for all of their cards wins!

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No matter what sort of hand we’ve been dealt in life, we all have areas of need. We all have weakness, struggle, pain, or just a general desire for something we feel we’re missing. None of us are perfectly complete – no matter how independent we think we are!

Over the past few weeks, I’ve been reading through the Psalms and realizing what a huge gift they are. These song lyrics, written by David and several other writers, give us a beautiful picture of what it means to have a ‘personal’ relationship with God. Instead of just hearing about someone’s life events, we get first-person perspective on their highest highs, their lowest lows, and their thoughts about God in the midst of it all.

One of the things I noticed, particularly in Psalms 142 and 143, was how David expressed each of his needs and then “matched” them with what He knew to be true about God’s character. David’s life experiences had proven to him that God was the only one who could truly meet His needs – so he filled his songs with these requests:

Need: “When my spirit grows faint within me” (142:3)
Match: “It is you who watch over my way” (142:3)

Need: “No one is concerned for me, I have no refuge” (142:4)
Match: “I cry to you, Lord; I say, ‘You are my refuge'” (142:5)

Need: “Those who pursue me… are too strong for me” (142:6)
Match: “The righteous will gather about me because of your goodness to me” (142:7)

Need: “So my spirit grows faint within me; my heart within me is dismayed” (143:4)
Match: “I remember the days of long ago; I meditate on all your works and consider what your hands have done.” (143:5)

Need: “Show me the way I should go” (143:8)
Match: “For to you I entrust my life” (143:8)

Need: “The enemy pursues me, he crushes me to the ground” (143:3)
Match: “In your righteousness, bring me out of trouble” (143:11)

Do you see how David matched his fear with God’s faithfulness, his vulnerability with God’s protection, his weakness with God’s goodness, his uncertainty with God’s trustworthiness, his injustice with God’s righteousness? And that’s only two psalms!

For every need we have, God holds the perfect match! And His desire is that we – like David – simply identify the need, express it, and then ask Him to meet it. We don’t have to “Go Fish” hoping we’ll somehow “fish our wish” from the piles of cards the world has laid out for us. Not only does He promise to meet our needs, but He promises to meet our needs in the best way possible – with Himself.

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Anyone who’s played “Go Fish” before knows that the most likely path to victory is to start out with the greatest number of matches already in your hand. Getting rid of 2, 4, or even 6 of your 7 cards right at the start could give you a huge advantage!

Psalm 143:5 reminds us that the best way to have our needs “matched” with God’s character is to already have the knowledge of His character readily at hand. If you’ve been reading and studying His Word, you can “remember the days of long ago” and know that He is the same God now as He was in the beginning! If you’ve been stirring up the Spirit through worship and prayer, you can “consider what [His] hands have done” in your own life and more easily be able to see how He can and will meet your current need.

So, what’s your need today? It may feel like you’re losing, but victory may just be a simple request away. Whatever it is, God’s got a perfect match for it in Himself!

The Lord is gracious and compassionate,
slow to anger and rich in love.
The Lord is good to all;
he has compassion on all he has made.
The Lord is trustworthy in all he promises
and faithful in all he does.
The Lord upholds all who fall
and lifts up all who are bowed down.
The eyes of all look to you,
and you give them their food at the proper time.
You open your hand
and satisfy the desires of every living thing.
The Lord is righteous in all his ways
and faithful in all he does.
The Lord is near to all who call on him,
to all who call on him in truth.
(Psalm 145:8-9, 13-18)

For a great resource, check out: “30 Days of Praying the Names and Attributes of God” by The Navigators

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Repost: Perception

(Originally posted October 2016)

“CAUTION: PRIMITIVE TRAIL – DIFFICULT HIKING” The signs placed along the Primitive Loop of the Devil’s Garden Trail at Arches National Park serve as a warning to inexperienced or unprepared tourists. But to my experienced and prepared, ready-for-adventure self, they might as well have said “You MUST go this way!”

After seeing the majority of our arches for the day on the main trail, my friend Sue and I made a right at the sign to go the long way and complete the loop. There was only one arch on this trail, but there would be way less people and way more fun!

As we approached the sign for the Private Arch spur trail, though, the fatigue was beginning to set in. It was hot out there in the desert and we still had a long way to go – was the extra mileage worth it to see another arch? We decided that since we had come this far, we might as well, and set off on the trail.

Just then, another hiker, who was returning from the arch, walked over to us and asked, “Are you going to Private Arch?”

“Yep,” we answered.

“Okay, well you need to be careful,” she said. “You’re definitely going to lose the trail, it’s not marked well at all!”

Sue and I looked at each other like with that “Yikes – maybe we shouldn’t do this!?” kind of look.

“Is it far?” we asked.

“Yeah, it’s pretty far,” she replied.

Knowing it may not have been the best choice – we embarked on the trail anyway, agreeing to be careful and make sure we were staying on the trail.

The trails in Arches, like many hiking trails, are marked with “cairns” – small rock towers that signify each turn or change in the trail. On this “primitive” and less-maintained trail, the cairns were fewer and further between and some of them were just a scattered pile of what-once-was-a-tower. Since the last thing you want to do in the middle of the desert, when there’s very few people around, is get lost, we took it nice and slow.

After just a couple minutes, though, we got to a point where there were no cairns. There was a sandy trail off to the left, but the footprints looked old – or were they just wind-blown? We decided this must have been what our friend was talking about, so we stopped and, for a solid few minutes, looked all around the area, making sure we weren’t missing anything.

Our search came to an end when we heard the voices of another group of hikers who were, of course, coming toward us along that sandy path. Duh. We then followed that path, thinking we still had a long way to go and just a few steps later almost walked into the sign saying we had reached Private Arch. The entire trail was about 1/10 of a mile and took just a few minutes to hike!

We still can’t figure it out – did we look that clueless? Or did she just get really lost and feel the need to warn us?

Regardless, here’s what happened. We let someone else’s perception of a situation determine our attitude – and therefore our action – in it. This was an obvious and short trail, but we almost got lost because we let her perception cause us to question our judgment. We stressed and worried about something that, if we hadn’t run into her, we would have had no reason to stress and worry about!

Perception (what we hear, see, or think we know about a situation) does not always equal reality (the whole truth or most likely outcome of a situation). Many times, our perception of a situation leads us to say, “I can’t because…”

“I can’t have that hard conversation because…”
“I can’t forgive that person because…”
“I can’t ask that person for help because…”
“I can’t talk about my faith around that person because…”
“I can’t reach out to that person because…”
“I can’t spend time alone with God on a regular basis because…”
“I can’t apply for that job because…”
“I can’t get out of this relationship because…”
“I can’t tell anyone what happened to me because…”

We let our perception (the “because”) determine our attitude and action (“I can’t”).

David was the youngest son in his family. During this time of fairly constant battle and war for the Israelites, some of David’s older brothers were sent to fight in the army. David, probably in his late teens at that point, was a part-time musician and part-time shepherd boy – and according to 1 Samuel 17:15, his dad’s part-time errand-boy. Since he wasn’t fighting in the battles himself, his dad sent him to check on his brothers and bring them some food.

When he arrived, though, David found the circumstances to be less than ideal. The opposing army, the Philistines, had issued a challenge: The winner of this battle would be decided by a one-on-one, to-the-death duel! Their chosen fighter was a man named Goliath. This approximately 9-foot-tall giant “had a bronze helmet on his head and wore a coat of scale armor of bronze weighing five thousand shekels; on his legs he wore bronze greaves, and a bronze javelin was slung on his back. His spear shaft was like a weaver’s rod, and its iron point weighed six hundred shekels.” (1 Samuel 17:5-7)

As he was talking with [his brothers], Goliath, the Philistine champion from Gath, stepped out from his lines and shouted his usual defiance, and David heard it. Whenever the Israelites saw the man, they all fled from him in great fear. (17:23-24)

To David, what was happening in this last verse scared him more than the giant himself. Goliath was waiting for someone to step forward – but no one was volunteering. And not only were they not stepping up, they were running in the other direction! They were letting their collective perception of the situation determine their attitude and therefore their action in it.

Their perception was:
“If he’s that tall, he must be more powerful than me!”
“If he can carry all that weight (his coat alone weighed 125 pounds), he must be incredibly strong!”
“If they chose him, he must be an exceptionally successful warrior!”

But maybe David saw something else. Maybe instead he thought:
“Just because he’s tall, doesn’t mean he’s powerful. It just means he’s tall.
“He may be able to carry all that weight, but what if that weight will actually slow him down?”
“Just because they chose him to be the ‘big scary guy you guys don’t want to fight’ doesn’t mean he’s actually a skilled warrior.”
Maybe David looked at Goliath and compared Goliath’s size to God’s – instead of his own.
Maybe David realized that Goliath might not be as scary as they thought.

And guess what? He was right. One rock in a slingshot and he took him down. Goliath was expecting a hand-to-hand sword fight and this attack blindsided him. Maybe Goliath just underestimated David’s abilities, but if he really had been such a great and mighty warrior wouldn’t he have seen it coming or found a way to fight against it? Maybe he wasn’t so powerful after all.

Maybe our perception of the giants in our lives – those “I can’t because’s” is not always correct. Maybe they look big and scary. Maybe we’ve heard that they’re big and scary. But there’s a good chance our perception of their power is causing us unnecessary stress and anxiety. Our perception of the situation is determining our attitude and therefore our action in it.

A few days later, as Sue and I were reaching the turn-around point of a hike in Hidden Canyon, we ran into a pair of hikers who, again, offered their advice:

“Are you headed to Observation Point?”

“No, we weren’t planning on it,” we replied.

“Well, you should totally do it, it’s the best view in the whole park and you’re like a third of the way there already!” they said.

“Hmmm,” we thought. “This was supposed to be our easy day, but if we’re already a third of the way there, maybe we should do it. We wouldn’t want to miss out on the best view in the park!”

As we started up the trail, we could see this area that we were sure was the “top” of the trail and we thought, “Yeah, that doesn’t look too bad!”

Well… a solid few hours and almost 2000 feet of elevation gain later, sucking in our last drops of water, having NOT worn our hiking boots that day, we finally reached Observation Point.

Yes, the view was outstanding, but unfortunately, we had again let someone else’s perception of a situation determine our course of action. If we had done what we easily could have done and pulled out our handy-dandy park guide, we would have seen that this was not a good choice! We would have seen that the “⅓” we had already hiked was, in reality, more like “⅛”! We would have read that this was a “strenuous” 8-mile round-trip which we were not prepared for. We could have made the choice to pause and see the reality of the situation, but we didn’t.

The reason David was able to see the truth about Goliath was because of His close relationship with God and therefore His ability to see things from God’s perspective. David knew that – worst case scenario – even if Goliath was the “champion” they claimed him to be – that God was still greater. He knew that even if he died in this battle, it was still better than doing what the rest of the army was doing – living in defeat without even taking one step towards trying.

With every “giant” situation you have in front of you today – there’s going to be a worst-case scenario (or multiple almost-worst-case scenarios) that come to mind. You can let those perceptions determine your attitude and your course of action (“I can’t because…”) – or you can pause right now and ask God for His perspective.

Maybe He’ll show you that those giants aren’t so scary after all!

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Repost: Chains

(Originally posted September 2016)

Exciting. Unusual. Bold. Risky. Hazardous. Uncertain.

I’m a big-talker about my love for adventure. It began when I was a camp counselor in high school and I’m still a firm believer in the power of overcoming fears and pushing through obstacles while being surrounded by nature.

The problem is that when it comes down to it, I’m also a big scaredy-pants! Not only do I have a fear of heights, but I’m also afraid of spiders, bugs, snakes, and the dark. The only thing I have going for me is a fierce sense of perseverance and pride in being ‘adventurous’ – so I rarely let my fears stop me.

On one of our last days in Utah, my friend Sue and I set out to hike to Hidden Canyon, one of the “chain” hikes in Zion National Park. With every step up from the base of the mountain, I was getting more and more excited about this adventure – a cliff trail so narrow they need to give you chains to hold onto? This was right up my alley!

When we finally reached the cliff section, I took hold of the first chain and began making my way, hand over hand, up the trail. To my right was a slick, steep drop into the canyon below – and to my left, some nice, safe, strong metal links to ease my fears.

After a few minutes, though, I had a moment. One of those life-defining moments where you have to stop in your tracks because you hear the Holy Spirit speak so clearly: “Umm… really? You are a healthy, athletic, experienced hiker! Clinging to these chains is actually making this hike MORE dangerous for you. Be confident in who you are!”

As I stood there and thought about it, I realized how silly it all was. Yes, if a sudden gale-force wind appeared or some maniac came barreling down the path, I may have been in danger, but it was true – my dependence and focus on the chains was putting me at a higher risk to lose my balance or even trip over my own two feet!

In his letter to the church in Philippi, Paul, writing from prison, said this to his audience: “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 1:6) Not wanting them to be discouraged by his chains, he instead encouraged them with his absolute confidence that God was at work and would continue to be at work in their lives.

Later on in the letter, he again reminded them that “it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose.” (2:13) Not only was God doing His work in them, but it was for a purpose. Paul was thoroughly convinced that a constant shaping and molding process was happening in the lives of all believers in order that they might “do good works, which God prepared in advance” for them to do. (Ephesians 2:10)

Why did Paul say these things? Because he wanted them to have the same confidence. He wanted them to continue boldly in their mission – even if it was unusual, risky, hazardous, and uncertain. He wanted them to know that they were not on their own in this adventure of faith – God was not only at work in them, but He had uniquely prepared each of them for this purpose.

Being a follower of Jesus can’t be defined as anything less than an adventure – because when you have the God of the Universe working inside of you to fulfill His purpose, that means things like overcoming fears and pushing through obstacles become a part of your everyday life!

And I don’t know about you, but for some reason the chains of insecurity almost always feel safer than standing up and doing the things I know that God has already prepared me for me to do. I prefer to cling to the “Well, I’m not really sure if God wants me to talk to that person, so I should probably wait” or “If I don’t confront that situation, God will just work it out” or “I’ll probably just screw it up – surely He can find someone else to do it!” It may look like faith, but really I’m just putting myself at even greater risk – not of falling – but of missing out on the adventure.

No matter how old you are and no matter what you’ve been through – God has used every one of your circumstances and experiences thus far to shape you for whatever is coming next. He’s developed in you strengths, skills, and gifts that will enable you to do whatever He’s asking you to do.

So today you and I have the chance to choose confidence – to let go of the chains and stand tall on the fact that that He has done good work! Of course we are constantly dependent on Him and His leading, but we must also learn to trust in the work He’s already done.

When I let go of the chains on the Hidden Canyon trail, I was surprised to find that my fear of falling actually lessened. Sure, the chains were there if I needed them, but guess what – I didn’t need them I walked confidently to the end of that section of the trail – enjoying it instead of holding my breath.

I can’t even tell you the number of times the Holy Spirit has brought this memory to mind over the past few weeks. He has given me opportunity after opportunity to be brave and just do that thing He has placed in front of me in that moment. Man, it’s scary, but it’s all about the adventure, right?

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Repost: Gradual

(Originally posted May 2016)

Last summer we had the opportunity to visit one of Tim’s favorite childhood spots – Sand Bar State Park in northern Vermont. This park, built on the shores of beautiful Lake Champlain, offers a very unique and memorable swimming experience.

The water in this area, which would normally be around 150 feet deep, was naturally filled over time with sediment from the Lamoille River as it drained into the lake. The resulting wide area of shallow water makes the swimming area perfect for small children (and people like me who don’t like to get wet!).

As you take a few steps into the water, your brain automatically expects it to get deeper, but you keep going and it barely seems to change at all. It’s a crazy feeling to walk a hundred feet off the shore and still be only a few feet deep!

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Last week I had the incredible opportunity to attend a children and student ministries conference in Atlanta, GA. One of my favorite sessions was led by Pastor Andy Stanley as he shared about how the church saved his life.*

In his message, he explained that it wasn’t one message, one program, or one person that made the difference for him – but rather the cumulative effect of many years of being influenced by his church as he grew up. Andy shared that the church informed his conscience and view of God, showed him that his life had purpose, helped him form lifelong friendships, gave him a window into God’s activity in the world, and taught him generosity.

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Some of my earliest childhood memories have to do with church. Every Sunday, even in the crazy infant and preschool years, my mom would pack us up and we would spend all morning singing Bible songs, going to Sunday School classes, trying to stay quiet in church, and hoping it was a “coffee hour” Sunday (because that meant one thing: baked goods.)

As I reached my late teen years, though, I began to see a Christian world outside of my small-town church and became increasingly discontent with where God had put me. I saw newer worship styles, heard more relevant messages, and met people my age who shared my beliefs. I suddenly felt that for all those years I had been missing out, so I wanted out.

But, 20 years later and now, as a parent myself, I, like Andy Stanley, look back and realize that God used that imperfect little congregation to save my life! It wasn’t one dramatic drop-off into the deep-end moment – but gradual, step by step, week by week, almost imperceptible changes in my growing heart and mind.

So thank you, First Baptist Church of South Londonderry, for informing my conscience and my view of God. Thank you for teaching me the same Bible stories over and over again and for making me memorize John 3:16 and Psalm 23. Thank you for teaching me that, “Wide, wide as the ocean, high as the heavens above; Deep, deep as the deepest sea is my Savior’s love”** and for showing me that it was possible to forgive just as I had been forgiven.

Thank you, First Baptist, for showing me that my life had a purpose beyond myself. Thank you for telling me the stories of men and women who gave their whole lives to serving God – and for encouraging me to take steps toward that life. And thanks for letting the students take over that service that one Sunday where I gave my first message 😉

Thank you, First Baptist, for faithfully putting your tithes and offerings in those little envelopes so that I could go to summer camp, where I met people my age who loved Jesus, too. Thank you for giving so that I could be surrounded with friends who showed me what a personal relationship with God could look like at my age.

Thank you, First Baptist, for teaching me that “Jesus loves the little children of the world,” and for showing me pictures of a world in need – not just to open my eyes to their plight, but to show me that I could do something to help.

And thank you, First Baptist, for planting in me seeds of generosity that helped me understand that love was meant to be given away.

In Ezekiel 47, the prophet is shown a vision of a river, flowing out of the temple – the place where the Spirit of God was known to dwell. As he is led to walk through this river, he points out that after 1,000 cubits (about 1/3 of a mile) the water is only ankle-deep. Then after another thousand it’s still only knee-deep. After another thousand it’s now waist deep. And then another thousand cubits later, the water is finally over-his-head deep.

Like walking into the Lake Champlain sand bar, the depth increase would be so gradual it would be almost impossible to feel the difference from one step to the next. But over time the river grows to fullness and in the end it “enters the Dead Sea. When it empties into the sea, the salty water there becomes fresh. Swarms of living creatures will live wherever the river flows. There will be large numbers of fish, because this water flows there and makes the salt water fresh; so where the river flows everything will live.” (Ezekiel 47:8-9)

As Spirit-filled believers, we have rivers of life flowing out of us – and when we pour into the lives of children and students, we have the potential to save lives. It may not feel like you’re making a difference because the effect is so gradual – I’m sure there were times when my Sunday School teachers thought that nothing was sinking in, but it was. The fresh waters of the Spirit flowing through people like you into the hearts of the next generation has the potential for so much life.

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You don’t have to be a superstar, you just need to show up. You don’t need to create the best church, you just need to be the church. You don’t even need to work directly with kids if they’re not your thing – you can give financially to ministry activities, support parents, or just be an example of what it looks like to be a growing follower of Jesus.

The love and support of an active, involved local church congregation could change everything for a child. It did for this one and I will be eternally grateful.

*Andy Stanley, Orange Conference 2016, “Save A Life”
**”Wide, Wide As The Ocean”, C.A. Miles, 1914

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Repost: Up

(Originally posted September 2016)

​Two years ago, Tim and I made what we think might be our best purchase ever – a 1998 Starcraft Venture Pop-Up Camper. We call it our “Home Away From Home” and we love every night we get to spend in it! At almost 20 years old, though, this well-used (and well-loved!) camper is a bit of an undertaking to set up – especially in the dark.

Which is what we were attempting to do on our first camping trip of summer 2016. Having arrived at the Delaware Water Gap KOA after 9pm, we knew we would be setting up after dark – but we were up for the challenge!

At one point, as we were wrapping up the process, Tim said to me, “Mandy, can you come over here?” He sounded really concerned. And I was really concerned because if you know Tim, you know that him being “concerned” about anything is really rare!

I walked over to the side of the camper he was on and he said to me, “Run your hand along this aluminum edging.” Before I even touched it I got a shock in my hand (OW!) and then when I actually did touch it, I could feel a vibration.

This was very strange, so we began walking around the camper, touching all the metal edges (Really, it seemed like a good idea at the time!) And yes, every time you touched any of the aluminum rims of the camper, you would get a shock and then feel a vibration.

At this point, panic was setting in. Our camper was somehow producing electricity and we were supposed to sleep in there! This couldn’t be safe! The mom in me was like, “There’s no way I’m letting my kids sleep in this camper tonight!”

Unfortunately, though, we didn’t have much of a choice. So we began looking all around, above, and underneath the camper for some sort of answer. Tim even asked one of our neighbors to come over and see if he could feel it, too – you know, just to make sure we weren’t losing our minds.

“Nah, I don’t feel anything,” the man said. And as he walked away, I said to Tim, “That’s it. We are officially crazy. We are your crazy campground neighbors who pull in late at night and believe their camper is mysteriously vibrating! We need help.

We all need help. We might not need it all the time and some of us might need more than others, but we all need help. Sometimes we need practical help – none of us are super-people and that extra hand or wisdom-filled guidance from someone who’s done it before can be life- (or sanity) saving.

But more often than we like to admit, we need real help. We are humans living in a broken world filled with other humans, so problems are a guarantee! Our struggles may look different, but everyone has them.

The question is: When you have problems, where are you looking for help? When a struggle rears its ugly head in your life, what’s your gut reaction – where do you go first?

We have four options:

1) Look inside yourself. This is everything we’ve ever been taught in Disney movies, music lyrics, and in social media quotes – “The strength is within you! The answers you seek are within yourself! You are strong! You can handle this!”

2) Look to other people. If you’re like me, your first reaction when you are upset or stressed is a dire need to tell someone about it. Most of the time you just need someone to listen to your rambling – and sometimes you really do need some advice.

3) Look to stuff. This one, unfortunately, is the number one “gut instinct” for most of us, even if we don’t realize it. Social media, games, Netflix, food, alcohol, drugs – you name it. I know my phone is a wonderful little distraction – when my eyes are on that screen I can forget about whatever it is I don’t really want to be thinking about!

4) Look up. The last option is to look outside of yourself, outside of other people, outside of this world, and do what David did in Psalm 121:

I lift up my eyes to the mountains
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord,
the Maker of heaven and earth.

God is not only all-wise, all-knowing, all-powerful – He’s also deeply interested in helping us. He’s deeply interested in being your source of help. He’s just waiting for you to look up to Him. Looking down inside yourself, looking to others, or looking to stuff may be good options, but they’re not what’s best. The best and most helpful first thing we can do when we’re struggling is look up to God – and to make looking to Him become our gut instinct.

When Tim and I were trying to figure out our camper mystery, we had done all those things. We looked within the camper, we looked around the camper, and we asked someone else for help – but nothing was working. The thing is, we should have looked UP first! Because, as we found out later that night, our campsite was located under these:

There was so much electricity moving through those lines, we could hear it! With that much power directly above us, no wonder our old aluminum-rimmed camper was picking up some of the current!

Everyone has problems, but not everyone looks up to find the power that will truly help them. God has unlimited power to help you with everything – from the smallest of your daily worries – to the deepest of your issues – even issues that you don’t even know exist yet!

The truth is that the root of all of our problems is sin – not because we deliberately want to cause ourselves and others pain – but because instead of looking to God to be our help, we’re constantly looking to other things. We sin because we think it will help us feel better, look better, or be better.

But there’s good news because 2,000 years ago, God Himself put on human flesh and came to help. He willingly gave His life, dying a punishment kind of death to save us from ourselves.

Criminals in that time and place were hung up high – on crosses on hills – because their death was meant to be a visible warning to others. They wanted people to look up at Jesus and fear – but what they didn’t know was that looking up to Jesus on that cross would be the greatest rescue and the greatest healing and the greatest help in the history of mankind.

Have you come to the end of yourself? Have you exhausted all other options and realized He is the only answer? And if so, is looking up to Him your gut instinct every time life gives you a shock? God is available and He’s got plenty of power to offer – so look up!

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Telltale

Adventure is our family’s middle name, so when we’re presented with the opportunity to try something new that involves the outdoors, we say Desi-“Let’s Go!”

In September of 2015, we were invited by our good friends, the Vallette’s, to join them for a day of sailing on the Chesapeake Bay in Maryland. Though a couple of us struggle with motion sickness, we couldn’t pass up this opportunity to spend a day on the water!

As we set off from Green Point Landing, we couldn’t wait to get our sea legs on. The girls had a blast exploring the boat, Tim kicked back and relaxed, and though my eyes were “on the horizon,” my attention was on everything else that was going on – I had no idea sailing was so much work!

At one point, I overheard Amy remind her teenage son, who was taking his turn at the wheel, to “Watch your tell-tales!” Though I had never heard of “tell-tales” before, I looked up and immediately knew what she was talking about: Attached to the fabric on either side of the sail were tiny green and red tapes, just a few inches long, that danced in the wind as we moved along.

From my land-lubber understanding, these “tell-tales” are so named because they “tell” the sailor a “tale” about the sail’s position in relation to the wind’s force. When sailing upwind, the sail must be trimmed to a certain angle in order to catch the gusts properly and make headway. If both “tell-tales” are streaming straight back, the sail is “in good trim” and progress will be made. But if one side is hanging down or fluttering, the jib is “out of trim” and a slight adjustment is needed.*

Tell Tale 4-01

For the disciples, following Jesus was a lot of work. His ministry wasn’t contained to one place, which meant constant movement and travel. His ways weren’t conventional, so mental stamina was required for them to adjust and obey on the fly. And as we know from their stories, emotional energy was required as their faith was regularly being put to the test.

After a particularly challenging assignment in which Jesus sent the twelve out in pairs to towns and villages in Galilee, they “gathered around Jesus and reported to him all they had done and taught.” (Mark 6:30) He listened to their stories, but also noticed that “so many people were coming and going that they did not even have a chance to eat”. Though they could have given their report and moved right on into more ministry, Jesus instead said: “‘Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.’ So they went away by themselves in a boat to a solitary place.” (v. 31-32)

Jesus knew that the demands from this point on would be endless and there would be potential for them to fill every second of every day with ministry. But He also knew that in order to continue making headway, they needed a break from the demands and some time for their energy to be restored – especially if there was no time to eat! Even Jesus didn’t want to deal with a bunch of hangry disciples!

In his book, “Emotionally Healthy Spirituality,” author Pete Scazzero points out that, “We are called to lay down our lives for others (1 John 3:16). But remember, you first need a ‘self’ to lay down.” Giving something away requires having a grasp on it first, and giving my ‘self’ away requires me to have a grasp on what that ‘self’ is. And part of knowing what I have to give away is knowing how I can restore what I’ve given away through self-care.

“Self-care is never a selfish act – it is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer others.”** Self-care puts wind back in our sails and gives us the energy to keep pressing on loving others in an upwind kind of way. When I sense an emotional meltdown approaching, it’s a telltale sign that it may be time for some self-care. I keep a list next to my bed: Have I been spending quality time with God? Am I getting enough sleep? Have I had a significant chunk of alone time in the last week? Did I make time for exercise today? When was the last time I read a book or watched a show just for fun? The answers to those questions usually reveal that my sail position needs to be adjusted!

If you open your Bible and look up the verses quoted above, Mark 6:30-32, you’ll find they are the opening verses of a story you may know well: “Jesus Feeds the Five Thousand”. In their attempt to sneak away, “many who saw them leaving recognized them and ran on foot from all the towns and got there ahead of them.” So much for that “down time”! And of course “when Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, he had compassion on them, because they were like sheep without a shepherd. So he began teaching them many things.” (v. 33-34)

The boat ride was all they got and I think if you asked Jesus, He would have said the boat ride was all they needed. The (possibly still a bit hangry) disciples went right into another time of ministry and right into another testing of their faith – but also right into another life-giving miracle.

In my tendency to overcorrect, I often crank the wheel right past self-care and all the way over into self-serving. I was born selfish and when I give myself an inch, I’m tempted to take a mile. And I’ve noticed that the same indicators exist in the other direction – my emotional meltdowns, impatience when little things don’t go my way, and overly critical spirit are telling me a tale that all I seem to care about is myself and it’s time to give some of that self away.

Tell Tale 5 (1)-01

I’ve never found myself at the wheel of a sailboat, but I’ve spent plenty of time steering motorboats and there’s no such thing (at least in the boats I’ve driven) as ‘autopilot’. You can’t just let go and assume the boat will go straight – it’s a constant process of small adjustments requiring you to keep your hands on the wheel at all times!

Making headway as a follower of Jesus requires the same hands-on-the-wheel attention. There’s no cut-and-dry rule for the exact amount of “self-care” or the exact amount of “others-care” we need to get our tell-tales to align. The path our boat takes may look more like a zig-zag rather than a straight line, but that’s because it’s a process. Jesus knows me better than I know myself, He’s always with me, and I can trust in His navigational skills!

Speaking of indicators, when I fall asleep in the first five minutes of the season finale of my favorite show (and it’s the wedding episode I’ve been waiting years for!), it’s a telltale sign that I’m not getting enough sleep and it’s time for something to give. May is here, the school year is winding down, and I’m overdue to shift my brainpower over to prepping for our Youth@Hope summer SERVE trip. I’ll repost some of my favorites from 2016/2017 over the summer and be back re-energized with new ideas for the fall!

*https://www.thoughtco.com/trim-the-jib-using-telltales-2915477
** Parker Palmer, as quoted in “Emotionally Healthy Spirituality” p. 35

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